Since JJ’s latest continues to make waves (sorry) after five weeks in the Billboard Top Ten, some of you are bound to enjoy this Madonna cover. Reader Asher plucked from Auckland radio over the weekend (thanks mate). Stereogum neglects the sensitive surfer/songwriter demo no longer…
Jack Johnson & G. Love – “Holiday” [Link Removed]
Related listening: In Between Dreams‘ “Breakdown,” which appears (minus the ukulele) on Handsome Boy Modeling School’s White People.
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Well, I never liked either one of them before and now I f*n hate ‘em. Good to know you can still trust your gut.
Ben Stiller aside, Jack Johnson is Satan.
it would be impossible to be more boring than jack johnson. impossible.
Nothing is impossible. Let’s see… Yanni? John Tesh?
go on with ya, it’s not that bad, no one can argue with a harmonica, and this has lots of that.
trevor, i’d rather listen to yanni!!
Yeah, I don’t know why all the hate for Jack Johnson. The Bo Diddley on the end is particularly cool. No complaints.
Kelly Clarkson & Jack Johnson are two people who by all means i would normally hate but really like their new cds … and the Handsome Boy remix version is much better
At first I looked at the title of the post (Jack Johnson Does Madonna) and asked myself, “Well, who hasn’t?”
Then I thought, well, Jack Johnson has been dead for a long time now. I mean, the old boxer, is still kicking it with white women?
Then I realized it was just some bloke covering a crappy Madonna song. Then I tried to remember just who the hell be Jack Johnson anyway. That’s when I remembered he was the chap that sang that song, flake, but never mentioned flake in the song.
jack johnson blows
His single isn’t that bad but as I listened to this it was like 10 minutes long. Pretty bad.
You people are fucking crazy. Jack is way beyond anything you can comprehend.
the day before a jack johnson ad appears on stereogum, a crappy jack johnson cover gets posted for all to share and dissect.
all this after months and month of neglect by said website.
v. interesting timing.
> the day before a jack johnson ad appears on
> stereogum, a crappy jack johnson cover gets
> posted for all to share and dissect.
Just coincidence. For the record, Stereogum does not like Jack Johnson, but I figured some of you would like to hear him cover Madonna.
Madonna > Jack Johnson
you bash jack, why? besides ‘he blows’ and ‘he sucks’, whats the deal? you think he’s boring?
Jack is just doing his thing….. its not his fault your a, assholes and b, so unhappy with yourselves that you have to hate on people for doing well… in short no one is making you listen to it….. so turn it off if it offends you that much!
Jack johnson is just a cool laid back guy from Hawii who only writes feel good songs to make other people happy. Sorry he doesn’t do screamo, or bitch about how much life sucks. Boring? People need to slow down sometimes and take it easy.
I was at the blues and roots festival late last month and went and saw JJ late in the day. His set was laid back and a bit dull apart from the madonna cover! can you please put it back o your site – i didn’t get to download a copy!!!
Jack Johnson’s voice is the flattest I’ve ever heard. His music stinks. He couldn’t construct a real melody to save his life. I can’t believe he ever made it this far. He’s just terrible.
Get real man…. just cos your dense…. he’s amazing.just cos he doesnt need to do flashy tricks to make music that reaches people….
jackass johnson your a tool, the fact u rhymed a lame movie title with his name obviosuly puts your sense of melody and rhythm way above his. if your gonna rip someone, firstly make a point, and secondly pick the right person. If you ask me its one of the few covers that has ever superseeded its original, “fuck ya”
Jack Johnson is flaccid. Your only defending him because when you hear about how much Jack Johnson blows and sucks, you realize that as a fan of his music, you yourself must blow and suck. Or better yet, you’re upset because you have always known that you are soulless and boring, but you thought you could hide it from the world. You and The League of Nerds thought you could fool us by hiding behind that empty idle; a broken down old hippy that knocked his head a little too hard on some coral. Yes, that’s right, I’m talking about Jack Johnson.
More importantly though, I’m talking about how you suck. But it’s okay. I understand that it feels good to you. You hear that boring bastard and you identify–you think “I suck, but I’m not alone…maybe this means it is okay to suck?”. And while, no, it’s not okay to suck, I respect you all the same, because I recognize its not a choice for some people.
My purpose here is altruistic–I wanted only to prevent you from being lulled into a false sense of “safety in numbers”. “A million Jack Johnson fans can’t be wrong” but they can (and do) suck…badly.
Congrats, Dave. You win the “Post that most resembles the logic of a high school freshman” award. Kudos!
look all im saying is untill you’ve sold that many albums maybe….. just maybe you should calm down alittle? sweet to have your own say and all… but down talking a man you dont even know, and then a person who admires that man simply for just that, admiring some one who is sucessful in many diffrent areas( music, producer,film maker, photograper)and worthy of alittle admiration is just sad…. Your have strong opinons and so do i and im not sayng that jack is the be all and end all of the music world… just saying good on him and until you do some thing that is on par with his achievements then alittle less agro would be called for…
Just would like to say.. if any of you know the slightest thing about guitar and enjoy acoustic music.. then you would like JJ, but all of you who seem to hate him, must not know or like either. Thinking logically now, how many JJ “bashers” can re-enact one of his songs PERFECTLY.. probably NONE.. until you go off and learn one of his songs (perferably one of his hardest) then I suggest you stop dissing musical talents. All musicians are good/amazing in their own light. You don’t have like or love or even admire all of them or any of them, but at least give them the credit for their talent.
I can’t tell if “Hank” is really paying me a compliment or not? I think he is…thank you Hank.
As for JJ bashers reproducing JJ songs perfectly…what the fuck? Why would someone who hates Jack Johnson spend hours of his/her free time trying to reproduce him perfectly? That’s just fucking crazy! More than that, its masochistic–why not just get my mom to dress up in latex and give me a hot yogurt enema while I’m at it? Your crazy man!
dave your sick man… that is not what normal people think like.
Melissa, I could be wrong but I think your developing a crush on me.
You’re crazy, jack is God.
Attention tool number 2 (dave), im finding your use of big words quite entertaining, shame however that you couldnt use that bright mind of yours to realise ‘Hank’ was in fact ripping the fuck out of you. Anyway dave how about you chill down just a bit and realise that we are all different (to you[THANK GOD]) and our music tastes differ accordingly, let it go brother. And please dont tell me that we ‘blow’ and ‘suck’ cos that shit cuts deep man…
Oh by the way leave your yog ‘h’ urt (watch out for that h) fantasies to another site man, as well as such words as ‘masochistic’ your doing my head in you ‘flaccid’ wanker, and never think to yourself that ur doing us a favour! You could simply just shut the fuck up, now that would be altruistic… jack johnson rules and no body cares about u, see you bye!
Man you are the angriest Jack Johnson fan I have ever met. I am allowed to be angry because I hate Jack Johnson, but you are supposed all about kickin back, smokin the bong, and watching the sunset over the ocean–”peace, love, hey your dreadlocks smell good” that kind of shit. JJ would be disappointed in you…and come to think of it, I am too. Your right about one thing though, I don’t need all those big words to say that Jack Johnson sucks, because “Jack Johnson sucks” and that is really all that needs to be said.
Thanks for pointing out my “yogurt” typo, I’ll make sure to spell it correctly in the future. Can you imagine how embarrassing that would be if I spelt yogurt wrong in like a business document or something? I would be totally discredited, and maybe lose my job!
ps you suck
Melissa, are we still on for friday or what?
Its ok mate, i think we can all safely presume you wont find yourself writting any business documents in the foreseeable future, at least not in regard to yoghurt? Well lets hope not….. that would be quite sad… but probably not out of character…
Maybe you could write a document on generalisations and stereotypes, you seem to have a knack for that, somewhat misinformed, but your trying hard, you should be proud of that.
Anyway please excuse me I’ve gotta punch my first cone of the evening and then i gotta shampoo and condition my hair, get all the seaweed and shells out, light some candles and don my fav tye dye singlet???
And no I dont think Im the angriest jack johnson fan ever…. I just know a fuckwit when i see one
Hail ados we solute you man!
ok – thank goodness we cleared up the yoghurt typo. i had no idea what that word was supposed to be without the “h”.
and i don’t want to get involved in the other stuff going on here.
all i’d like to know is if its still possible to get a copy of the holiday cover. does anyone know of another site that has a copy?
Depends Dave…..Are you hot?
probably in a retarted kind of way melissa…
There is a nice pic of dave here…
Ados – I agree with Dave…you are angry and pathetic…just like JJ’s music; maybe gay too. FYI, JJ’s music is stupidly simple, mostly just two chords, back and forth. You apparently don’t understand this and what it means to have vocal range. Also, you can’t spell!
Melissa – You are nice but a little naive. Leave the music discussions to those who know better.
You also can’t spell!
Hank – In addition to licking JJ’s balls, please lick your own as well.
Dave – Take care and keep up the insults.
Me – I’m just hear to stir the pot.
Peace,
Jackass Johnson
Well better to be naive than bitter i think…. And as for spelling.Fuck who cares if i can spell, well not me thats for sure. Better thing in life than spelling.
jack johnsons music angry??? Are you off your head, or just dumb, were’nt you the ones knocking its simplne happy mellowness? Or was that Dave? Or are you infact ‘Dave’ under a different name? Is anyone else finding that? i wouldnt put it past you, when no one else sticks up for you, patting yourself on the back under a diff name is your kinda game i assume? Anyway Maybe you just have a short memory? Dont worry il cut you some slack and forget that your a contradicting dick… and take it back to the basics, il be nice for a while and forget the insults…
Correct me if im wrong, but are not you and your friends dave (sorry ‘friend’-forget the plural, i was being a little too ambitious)(oh and i forget the ‘immaginary’ before friends as well- sorry) going slightly out of your way to inflict your oppinion on shit that wasnt asking for ur mindless and boring thoughts in the first place. Do have a dig at the music you like ‘just because i dont listen to it’…no! for a start because i have better things to do, and secondly cos i really dont care. i couldnt give a shit what your into, but obviously you have some sort of complex whereby you and dave (if not the same loser/person) feel the need to dis other peoples style/interests/wateva to make yourself feel better about your own….
At least if your gonna bring down a man, stick your own neck out a little and please let me no what jack johnson “blows” in comparrisson to?
And please tell me, since when has music had to be complex to be successfull and enjoyable, you talk of simple as if its evil! what i suppose ben harper and bob dylan are shit to!? sorry il try and get into some more complex try hard shit from now on!
And for fucks sake mate i really dont give a shit if jack johnson plays one chord or three… you could play six and sound like shit! sorry mr exclusive music man, but havent you forgetton the point of music is to listen! its not a fuckin maths equation where you have to show the working out, if the end product sounds good (which in this case does-thats why we continue to listen) its a success!
so before you write back and try and pretend that your trying to enlighten me, just shut up, the wool is not being pulled over my eyes, i dont wanna look deeper, jack isnt pretending to be something hes not, he plays cool mellow music that puts me in a good mood and for the above reasons i really couldnt give a fuck what you think…
for the first time in your life try and stop being a tool and let people like what they want to, trust me-we all dont wanna be like you!
As the real Jack Johnson (prize fighter) would say, “Keep your shirt on!”
But I’m a lover, not a fighter. However, your last message is too fragmented (like your mind) and deep for me to comprehend. So, I’m going to recommend that you take a beta blocker or anti-depressant, depending on weather you have a bad ticker or are just depressed. I’ll leave it up to you to diagnose yourself. Good luck!
Sincerely,
Jackass Johnson
isnt it ok to sometimes like less than brilliant music?
Dave…. i miss you man, what happend to your witty yet scathing comments?
blah blah blah
In regard to jackass…
the “real jack johnson”??? fuck mate, you sink lower than i thought, when you cant accept anything ive stated or come up with anything original have a dig at jack johnson for having a name that someone else had before him, fuck champ… your on fire
dont worry there were probably a billion people called dave (or wateva ur name is) in the world before you sadly joined it, and im sure 99% of those were a shitload better than you to?
Ados – go back to school. You’re stupid and Jack Johnson hates you. Also, I don’t care what nationality you are, the use of “mate” is inexcusably gay. Your use of “mate” leads me to three possible conclusions; A) your an Aussie, B) your a Brit, or C) you’ve got a giant bush of fiery red pubic hair (for which you have been mocked and excluded all of your life), and probably you are missing a ball (also leading to further mockery and exclusion). Personally, I think C is the right answer, but irregardless you’re gay.
Melissa – It would never work out between us.
JACK JOHNSON SUCS 4 LIFE!!!
FUCK YEA!
Dave, out.
You could have just saved yourself the time and guessed (A), but its ok, if you were attempting to find out if your weird genitalia was in fact shared by anyone else out there, well no, sorry i cant help u there….
P.S. its ok we all need to get these things off our chest… actually no not really, your just a freak
You guys have too much spare time on your hands. Chillax weirdos!
Here’s the thing. I was a JJ fan until I discovered how much of a sell out he really is. He’s in it for the money not the music. If he gave two Sh*** about his fans than he wouldn’t allow ticket brokers to buy up his tickets and sell them for outrageously inflated prices – going rate about $200. The thing is he is not an artist that can sell out a show, I guess the only way for him to sell out is to be a sell out. I’ll say this is one fan who is not so much anymore.
Ok, here is the thing, Jack Johnson, from a guitarists point of view, is absolute shit. Its like acoustic punk music, where cycles 3 or 4 chords and add a lil muting here and there. All his songs sound like they were written in 1 minutes tops, which means he shitted out 3 albums in less than 30 minutes. So maybe he’s laid back, but please, please, please, someone with more TALENT please.
Dave, you are obviously some pimple faced teenager who is bitter that your mommy doesn’t breast feed you anymore. Do you hate puppies too? What about kittens? They probably rubbed you the wrong way too, right? Take your insecurities and channel them into something creative, so we can tell YOU how much YOU suck. Why don’t you post something that YOU have written, or give us insight to what you are good at, besides making yourself look like a fool.
Jack Johnson cares about our planet, loves his wife, and is genuinely talented. He is good people. “So it seems” is Melissa, Ados, Tom, and those who stuck up for Jack. I mean shit I do NOT like opera, but I can appreciate that fact that those people can SING!
Music, in any form, is something that we can use to tune our emotions, even anger Dave.
Keep up the good work Jack.
Jack Johnson is background music…
soooooooo boring.
being a musician myself, I can say that a) I think Jack Johnson blows, and b) I’m jealous that I didn’t find the song that he rewrites over and over and over again sooner…
I play a joke on people who ask me to play a jack johnson song by playing a simple little bluesy pop riff that sounds like his stuff, and then say, “So, which song is it that I’m playing?” and NO ONE KNOWS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ME APING HIM AND PLAYING HIS MUSIC!!!
I do the same thing with that Puddle of Mudd song and “summer lovin’” from grease… as well as Sublime’s “what I got” when I start singing “Lady Madonna” by the Beatles instead… real fan’s of music know when someone is a scam artist… and JJ is one of them… believe that.
Sounds like someone knows what he’s talking about. Yes, keef.
Just because Jack Johnson can “create” a “catchy” riff and sing as flat as me on a sunday morning doesn’t make him talented. People are saying he’s the new Bob Dylan. Those people are of the kind that have no recognition of what music came before them, they think KoRn invented metal, that type.
You have to realise everyone is influenced, but it’s what you do with your influences and how you use your talent to create something different, and JJ is hardly different. He’s just a rip off of every small child writing a song. Simple songs for simple minded folk. And he’s pop, not “surf rock”.
Amen Icarus
First off yes I realize this discussion died like 2 months ago, but people have been trying to make me listen to JJ lately and I needed to vent about it.
I honestly can’t understand what the fucking appeal of this guy is. His voice is flat and boring, guitar melodies are generic and thoughtless, the bass is usually played root notes – TO SLOW, EASY, BLUESY GUITAR! Inexcusable. It’s just boring. Now to be honest, soft “pretty” music isn’t really my thing, but I can appreciate it – off the top of my head Opeth, Iron and Wine, Noe Venable, etc say to me that music can be interesting without slaying, crushing, or brutality. Jack Johnson just really seems to me like he has nothing to say, and wouldn’t know how to say it if he did.
Jack’s shit
Jack Johnson is obviously doing something right. that guy dave seems like a douchebag.
JACK JOHNSON FUCKING SUCKS
Come on people – if you have time to ‘relax’ and ‘chill out’ to damn Jack Johnson, then obviously the door to your basement is jammed shut, or someone has locked you in to prevent you from passing on your bad taste in music.
He’s flat, toneless, boring, and I’d rather try and stuff bricks in my ears then have to listen to him.
FLACCID is a perfect word for Jack Johnson’s horrible, boring and perfectly inane muzak. Congratulations to the poster that came up with that adjective.
Had to post because I heard that fvcking “Bubble Toes” song coming to work again and I thought I’d crash my car into the bumper in front of me just to knock myself unconscious. Jesus, I hate that man’s music. He’s Dave Matthew’s soul mate in music hell. Tasteless, marshmallow blather. And that Curious George soundtrack means he should be consigned to the 9th circle of Hell upon physical death. (Clearly, his soul died long ago…)
Um. Yeah. I like Jack Johnson
But I do find his songs on the Curious George soundtrack quite boring and skip listening to them.
And to the “Yoghurt” typo up there…
Us Brits spell it with a ‘h’. So yeah…
Anyway, you either love Jack Johnson or you don’t. And just because someone likes him, doesn’t mean they ‘suck’. It means they have a different taste in music.
And not all people who enjoy a bit of JJ listen to music like that aswell.
Hell, I listen to almost every music under the cheery little umbrella.
Live and let live =]
And yeah, you can, you have my permission, to rip the piss outta me. Because that’s kina inevitable.
And if you’re going to be a little twatty and point out any spelling mistakes.
Chill.
I’m 14..
And failing English (woohoo.)
xox
Jack johnson’s sucks his mothers cock.
All of you haters have no clue what you’re talking about. U can hate the man all u want, but to say that he isn’t musically talented is just fucking ridiculous. As you obviously don’t realize, playing acoustic is a lot harder than electric. You actually have to hit all the notes and can’t drown out your mistakes with extra “sustain” or “crunch”. Oh, and even when Metallica was good, you can’t tell me they didn’t repeat that same damn chord progression over and over. Fade to black, master of puppets, one, etc…i can go on…So all you fucking metal heads that were born to hate, just remember, we all have more friends than you. Also, we’re probably smarter than you, especially when it comes to understanding music. Don’t get me wrong, i like heavy shit from time to time, but loud and fast does not always equal good.
This one time, like eight months ago, I saw two guys kissing in a park. And that was the gayest thing I’d ever seen, until I saw Jack Johnson.
Alright I’ve never been to this website till now and honestly, I fucking hate it. All you people keep bitching about how either jack johnson is “boring” or how Jack Johnson is “god.” Fucking hell people, its music. If you dont like it quit bitchin about it on a fuckin website, and quit havin the same damn excuse to not like jack johnson, no one here is proving a damn point. If you like Jack Johnson quit bitchin about how other people dont like him. People have different preferences of genres, its their own damn oppinion. Personally I like Jack Johnson, he writes good laid back tunes for people to enjoy, hell his whole band is creative. Listen to any side project his drummer Adam Topol has done, hes amazing, and Merlo the bassist, well if any of you like hip hop, check out stuff by del the funky homosapien and dan the automater, cause Merlo has worked with both of them. The whole Jack Johnson band has talent. I can go on and on talking about no talent bands these days who people are listening to all the time….screamo bands. But I’m not going to bitch about it like the rest of you.
well, let’s put it this way: he doesn’t make RAP or HIPHOP. there, case closed. if u dont make those kinds of music then chances are you have talent.
you all suck and jack jahnson sucks, another mainstream gimick, just let him have his money, he has your money hahahhaahahaahahah loosers. Not mine. I choose my music. I dont. Dont let the mainstream choose for you. bunch of little lemmings. sheep. bye
I know this is late but — Does it really matter who listens to what? If you don’t like it, you don’t have to listen to it! Nor do you have to lament the state of the universe just because other people enjoy it. If people think they can “do better”, I encourage them to get out there and try. But it’s pointless sitting behind a computer and insulting a musical artist. It’s just a waste of time. That time could be better spent penning a song or picking up a guitar.
My son wanted a friend in a Curious George show at a discovery museum. I kept thinking — this music is horrible. It is putting me to sleep and all the kids are bored out of their freaking minds. I let it go until I saw the movie Curious George. The same total crap songs were in the movie. I thought it was just some low budget music for the museum show. So I got online… Some guy named Jack Johnson I had never heard about. My god… He is horrific. At least someone has done a worse sound track to a cartoon than Phil Collins in Tarzan. Congrats Jack Johnson. You suck more than Phil Collins circa 1999.