“The world was shocked, and I was shocked,” Jennifer Aniston tells Vanity Fair of her split with Brad Pitt. “[With Brad] there’s a sensitivity chip that’s missing.” But wait — it gets better. Aniston says of Brad’s dyed locks: “Billy Idol called – he wants his look back.” Yes, she actually said that — you don’t work with Chandler for ten years without learning a terribly lame zinger or two.
This one’s for you Jenny.
Billy Idol – “Flesh For Fantasy (Remix)” (MP3 Link Removed)
Learn more about VF‘s Q&A with Aniston’s biological clock at USA Today.
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Yeah, well David Spade called- he wants to know if you’re doing anything on Thursday.
Second Post!
Brad Pitt called, he said he was too busy banging Angelina Jolie, listenting to her scream like a wild animal in the sack, to read this article about some boring, aging, former lame sitcom star and her petty gripes. My marriage failed, Waaahhh Waaaahhhh.
burn
She is waaay too good for Brad. He’ll wind up broken hearted with an STD and Jen will hopefully have a passel of kiddies and a man who loves and deserves here. Be strong my sista!
I love Jennifer Aninston and i hope that she find someone that can apreciate the great, funny and beautiful girl she is.
I love her hair!
not just a burn, an ICE burn… ooooh, it hurtssss
Brad is such an ASSHOLE!
sondra told him.
What’s up with Brad’s hair anyway?
Big bird call and he whant his feathers back!
NEWSFLASH!
Everybody involved in this ridiculous “scandal” thing is a moron.
You may now return to your regularly-scheduled shallowness.
Today girls don’t have to worry about “biological clock” there is some people having babies at the age of 40, and she can also freeze her egs!
She look great like a normal 36 year old woman, and if was her i will be desolate you guys suck!
Oh hell yes. The petty, passive-aggressive jabs show a lot of class, Jenny. Well done.
jay leno called… he wants his chin back…
p.s. i don’t ‘really’ mean that babe
p.p.s. just in case she knows what a blog is
God this is so boring. Has anyone heard the Most Serene Republic disc? It blows
You guys are just ridiculous!
I wish a girl like Jen, she seems funny plus she is hot. Some people don’t know how to appreciate what they have, is such a shame!
oh yeah, a bit off topic, but: ‘Pieces of April’ you know that movie with Katie Holmes is actually pretty good. the guy who wrote ‘what’s eating gilberts grape’ wrote & directed it.
and guess who’s also in it: sisqo (the THONG man)
I think her chin is cute, she is very cute.
yeah, well, the jerk store called!
I feel so sorry for Jen.
I love her so much in Friends
what’s everybody talking/whining about?! i don’t get it, she just said brad had a sensitivity chip missing…
that’s all
Poor jen yall!
If was her i will totaly devote myself to caballa yall!
takes two to tango miss jennifer.
oh and david brent – hilarious comeback, as always
Some of you guys are very cold.
Eheheh “the jerk store called…and they’re outta you!”
Best nonsensical burn evaaaaaarrr.
I could care less. Jen can get another man by the snap of a finger, wasn’t she with Vince Vaughn?
Also Brad just gotten over Malaria over his fake “I care about Africa as long as Angie will give me kinky sex” trips.
He’ll end up dying soon if he keeps it up.
After wasting precious moments of my life reading a bunch of articles on this subject, I really felt like she was being much more forgiving and overly-nice than petty/bitchy.
I mean, when she said she is choosing to believe Brad that he didn’t start sleeping with Angelina until their marriage broke up, I think that’s pretty generous.
And “Otherwise refusing to talk badly of Pitt, the actress says she doesn?t want to mimic the bitterness of her parents? divorce. ?I love Brad; I really love him. I will love him for the rest of my life,? says Aniston. ?I don?t regret any of it, and I?m not going to beat myself up about it.?
Having your husband abruptly dump you, very publicly, has got to be incredibly painful — I think she’s handling it pretty well, considering.
Oh and Pinder… love the jerk store reference.
who cares? let’s talk about music. anyone heard the new youth group disc? it’s lovely.
The girls all defend Jennifer Anniston.
Ha, Ha,
Is that because Angelina is some “larger than life” Sex Symbol, and Jenny is the girl next door.
Ha Ha!
This is second hand information, but what isn’t when talking about celebrities.
According to friends of a friend who met Jen and Brad at some wedding in Birmingham, Brad was a sociable and funny guy while Jen just talked to the ‘famous’ people.
I’m not saying that this one situation is representative of their overall personalities; just give the situation another look without the filter that you want to be in Jen’s pants more than in Brad’s.
Ew Joel. I didn’t defend her. I hate both Jen and Angelina equally.
And whoever wanted to talk about music — I’ve got Weezer’s We Are All On Drugs stuck in my head. Stupid but catchy.
Music? Who wants to talk about music? Aren’t there enough music blogs? I’d hate to see Stereogum start focusing on music.
/sarcasm
kiera, your grammar makes me puke.
ah geez, punctuation is overrated.
i think she’s allowed to make jabs at her ex. my parents did much, much worse.
hey jennifer — somebody who notoriously had a nosejob (i can’t think of anyone off the top of my head, other than jennifer aniston) called, and they want their nosejob back …
also, angelina — nicholas “coppola” cage called, and he wants his obnoxious decision to change his famous & powerful last name so it initially seems as if he made it in the film industry wholly and completely on his own merits and talent (yeah right) back …
and brad pitt — i want your abs. not that i ever had them in the first place, i’m just too lazy to do sit-ups …
I absolutely love that so many of Stereogum’s readers got the jerk reference.
Well fucking done, Pinder.
I just like how she says “the world was shocked, and I was shocked.”
Yeah, not only was she surprised but every person alive was surprised that a high-publicity celebrity mariage failed.
Take a deep breath, Jen.
SERENITY NOW!
Well, I slept with your wife!
Best friend Courteney Cox chimes in to reveal that while there was no affair, “there was a connection” between Jolie and Pitt, “and he was honest about that with Jen.”
Thats the best advice she could get. People change and shit Angelina is hott and Jen is to but them bottom line is that “Men Pu**y is a very powerfull force to be reckon with”.
I have to admit that I was surprised when Brad and Jen got married. Jen was never in Brad’s league. Brad has been generous for years.
His wife’s in a coma.
I can’t believe anyone thinks Brad Pitt is even remotely hot. Mid-life crises aren’t sexy, and his plastic surgery is so obvious.
Who cares Carlie, he is banging Angelina, and that make him hot.
Jennifer… Angelina called, she wants to know how her pussy tasted the last time you kissed Brad.
I bet it tasted good.
Brad… Billy Bob called, he wants his wife back.
I don’t think any of these three parties are hot, and Angie is really creepy. She and Brad probably deserve each other. They shake their fingers in our faces and preach at us about giving money to the poor, while they’re buying their fourth house and a must-have third world baby as an accessory. Angie strikes me as desperate, she’s always going after married men, and if she’s so bi, why is she never with a woman? In fact, I’m waiting for the day she claims Rosie O’Donnell as her own true love.
friends was probably the worst show ever.
Is the Jerk Store reference really that off the wall that we need this many comments about it? It’s from SEINFELD for godsake, not Trailer Park Boys or something. People should know it
Scott, I’m scared. Your bloggers are all pissy today and less articulate/hilarious than usual.
Scott, I’m scared. Your commenters don’t know the difference between bloggers and commenters.
And Jane, the commenters called, they want their correct name back, you silly goose.
Scott, I’m scared. Your commenters upon commenters don’t know the difference between bloggers, commenters, and commenters-upon-commenters. They also seem to all have “Jane” in their name.
And Jane and Jane’s Silly, the commenters and commenters-upon-commenters called, they want their correct name back, you silly Jane’s goose.
“brad had a sensitivity chip missing”
He’s a ROBOT?! I suppose that explains Meet Joe Black and, well, the rest of his career.
Angelina has dated Jenny Shizimu, the co-star of “Foxfire” and probably Sandra Bernhard, because it’s a rule that if you date women in Hollywood you have do sleep with that hag of a woman.
Thus is why Portia de Rossi hasn’t fully outted herself and hides beside Ellen, who is way cool with her talk show and all.
*to, not do…well…meh I haven’t slept ok.
Well played carlie, well played indeed.
I feel sorry for Jennifer, i am not a fan but i belive she is going trough hell right now.
“He’s a ROBOT?! I suppose that explains Meet Joe Black and, well, the rest of his career.”
BUA-HAHAHAA good one!!!!!!
how you can overlook jen’s face and still call her hot? i’ve always been disturbed by her looks, umm anyway i guess it does suck that she got dumped like that so publicly but maybe the whole situation was more complicated than we know..
Angelina’s lips look like hemorrhoids
What Brad did to her is so wrong!
I hope he burn in hell for that!
jen, u r a pretty, talented, and good hearted girl. brad is an ugly heartless guy. u deserve better, tell him off!!!! U GO GIRL!!!
To all that think Brad & Jolie are Hot! I couldn’t agree more! The Fornication & Adultery puts them closer & closer to Hell! Always Remember U Reap What U Sow!
OK. Angie was already damned, but now Brad are going to have a seat in satan’s lap!
Wow! You guys are harsh!
Hello,
The loser store called and they want their people back. Angelina’s mouth looks like a horrible allergic reaction to seafood. See “Girl Interrupted” where she looks like a dead person walking. Jen’s no babe from the neck up but she beats this one. Meanwhile Brad is hot but men typically look below the neck mainly. Therefore, the ladies are both pretty hot.
well here’s what i think. the “hottest guy in america”-whatever that- shouldn’t he be laying out a good example for other guys, considering he is a huge celebrity? “Yeah that’s right, ha, I’m the hottest guy in america, yeah, and I cheated on my wife too”. What an idiot. He had it good and now he’s stuck with the chick who has elephantitus in her mouth. Oh well he deserves her she’s just as screwed up as he is. And my boyfriend is way hotter.
Good for you Trina! Brad is F***ing looser i hate him so much and everything he does!
Ok Everyone
Most Actors in Unholywood have no idea about Morality.They all deserve what they Reap.They will all be punished in due course!YEAH!!99% of them will be stewing in HELL and only Mel Gibson will see the gates of heaven !!
I hope them all burn in hell, poor jen she don’t desearve that!
OK my opinion..jen is being too Freakin nice…its killing me. I think if she got a little nasty ppl would stop picking on her more…she should call him an A@@hole and loser….not that silly billy idol joke. She needs to get a little mean. Or ppl will walk all over u!! I Love ya Jen..but I mean it…u gotta be tougher..with a bit of an edge..it would even make u sexier.
Am i Right?? Or totally off course??