Welcome to the Grammys 2009, which promises to be a very special night in which Radiohead will perform with the USC marching band (proof!) and Robert Plant & Alison Krauss will win all the awards. Of course with all the promised performances there will be barely any time to hand out tiny gramophones. So far No Age missed their chance to be the first Smell band to win a Grammy (losing best packaging to Metallica’s terrifying vagina) and Rick Rubin beat Danger Mouse for Best Beard in Music Production. We figure nothing can be as bad as will.i.am last year, but he’s here again this year, so we can’t make any promises. Judging from the pre-event arrivals, M.I.A. might make good on her promise to give birth during her performance of “Paper Planes,” so let’s hurry up and get to this. This year’s special treat: We’ve got Gabe and Lindsay from Videogum over to make with the funny, and we’ll have EXCLUSIVE CONTENT on Twitter. You can’t stop this. This Grammys is REAL:
8:00 And we’re off with … U2′s “Sexy Boots.”
8:04: Well that happened. Not as interesting as Paul McCartney’s dye job.
8:05: Whitney Houston gets a standing ovation for not showing up with cocaine on her face!
8:08: Jennifer Hudson gets Best R&B award. Boyz II Men didn’t get the statue but they’re just excited to have a roof over their heads for a night. Everybody wins!
8:10: Damn. The Rock smells like shit.
8:10 Justin Timberlake and Al Green doing “Let’s Stay Together” featuring Keith Urban’s surprisingly tasty licks. The Reverend still has flow. No jokes there.
8:21 Damn, Coldplay didn’t send the puppets. This song is called “Lost.” Chris Martin’s outfit is called whaaaaa?
8:23: On SNAP make that “Lost+” because Jigga is onstage! Introducing the first time Jay-Z’s ever received a golf clap.
8:24: “Viva La Vida.” Man, that string section is CRUSHING IT. Wait, there’s no string section? Right.
8:30: Nice guitar solo, Lita Ford.
8:32: Best Country Performance goes to Sugarland. Yay I guess? You know, country and stuff. Face it, “Stay” is a great song, although Sugarland definitely took some liberties with that Lisa Loeb cover.
8:41: Song Of The Year goes to “Viva La Vida,” written by Joe Satriani (Feat. Creaky Boards).
8:45: At least Coldplay aren’t wearing the same outfits they always do, this time they are a slightly modified hue of ridiculous.
8:46: “Guilty of being white.” Kid Rock just made a Minor Threat reference! Not really, but we’re trying to see the good. Trying and also failing.
8:54: Miley Cyrus and Taylor Swift dueting! We saw their red carpet interview with Ryan Seacrest and they totally don’t hate each other, so just relax guys. You can stop caring so much about this.
8:57: Pop Collaboration With Vocals goes to Robert Plant and Alison Krauss, their first win of ALL THE AWARDS.
9:03: Jennifer Hudson gets a standing ovation, which is an appropriate response.
9:09: Can’t wait for that Sully (Feat. T-Pain) joint. More (Feat.) jokes!
9:10: If Stevie could only see all the misery he’s creating.
9:16: Coldplay beats Radiohead for Best Rock Album. I mean obviously, right guys?
9:21: Oh sorry, we blinked and then Blink 182′s reunion was over. Everybody’s back to hating Tom DeLonge again. Travis is much better looking post-helicopter crash than we are ever, so there’s that.
9:23: Katy Perry hits the screen, the keyboards in the Gum liveblog room go crazy.
9:24: Kanye follows the fruit and cleavage show with Estelle and “American Boy.” Everybody’s like who is that girl, we are like Estelle looks like pretty fly in that Hershey Kiss outfit.
9:30: Adele is the latest in a long line of British people taking all our awards tonight what up with that.
9:37: Morgan Freeman summons every last shred of his prowess as an actor in declaring his friendship with Kenny Chesny. Still not buying.
9:40: Robert Plant & Alison Krauss win Record Of The Year, their next in the series of winning ALL THE AWARDS, and depriving all of us of seeing a nine-month pregnant Sri Lankan from walking through the crowd. Now THAT’S (a lost chance at) entertainment.
9:43: Poor Alison never gets to say anything.
9:48: M.I.A.! “Paper Planes” for a second! PRO TIP: Black and white makes you look less pregnant.
9:51: Lil Wayne, Jay-Z, Kanye, and T.I.! The new brat pack! Or something! Admit it, even with carrying a human in her belly Maya’s got better moves than you.
9:56: Sir Paul doing “Saw Her Standing There” with Dave Grohl. Coachella ticket sales go up, Ringo’s spirits stay down.
10:05 Jack Black and jazz-bass great Charlie Haden give the Best Male Pop Vocal to John Mayer, beating Ne-Yo and Macca The cameraman registers his discontent by momentariliy disconnecting the live feed.
10:19: Gweyneth Paltrow, sans faux-British accent, introduces Radiohead. This to make up for all the times her husband bit their shit.
10:20: RADIOHEAD! “15 STEPS!” USC MARCHING BAND. This is the part where we stop typing for a minute and actually watch.
10:21: Between the USC marching band jamming with Radiohead, and the Vassar Orkestar playing with Beirut at BAM this weekend, college band geeks are having the best week ever.
10:22: On Thom Yorke: Now that’s how you dance, bitches. That is also how you grow out your hair.
10:24: Well shit that was good. You guys are right, we should really check out this Radiohead band sometime.
10:29: Justin Timberlake joines T.I. on “Dead And Gone.” This is actually pretty tight. Radiohead you can have your glossy marching band, JT and T.I. will take their rhythms bucket-ghettocore style, thanks.
10:36: Oh nice, the president of Recording of the World. I know this speech is somehow directed at me because he said “downloading,” but this speech also is somehow STOP TALKING YOU ARE GOING TO PUT AMERICA TO SLEEP.
10:38: Smokey Robinson looking good! You can’t see the tracks of his tears because the plastic on his face is water-repellent.
10:47: You know what? Fuck Sully.
10:48: OK gather the kids ’round the TV. Neil Diamond on “Sweet Caroline.” This guy is about to show you bitches how it’s done.
10:49: And it’s done by morphing into William Shatner.
10:53: Dead people montage. Lux Interior better be in this.
10:55: Keith Urban, B.B. King, Buddy Guy, and John Mayer trade solos in tribute to Bo Diddley. A couple people up there are mangling the blues, but B.B. still is doing great with diabetes, btw.
11:02: Thicke and Weezy. Lil Wayne is doing it right, Robin is straight groaning pains. (Zing.)
11:10: Lil Wayne wins Best Rap Album for Tha Carter III. But the surprise is how not-insane he is in accepting the award. He dropped the D, Miss Katie.
11:17 T-Bone, Krauss, Plant. aka the winners of ALL THE AWARDS.
11:18: OK you guys. Alison and Robert totally did it. Right?
11:24: And Album Of The Year goes to….
11:25: Robert Plant and Alison Krauss aka the winners of (you get it by now).
11:26: From the wisdom of Mr. Goldenfiddle: “Grammy Tip: If you ever find yourself already waiting backstage when your award is being announced, YOU WIN.”
11:27: God bless you too T-Bone. And you, Green Day. And you, Stevie Wonder. And you guys for making it through the longest Grammys in Grammy history (unverified fact).
This year the Grammys made overtures to hipness, and relevance, and in the end it still was obvious who was going to win ALL THE AWARDS. Hope you had fun with us. We’ll sign off by noting that NARAS has rather incredibly made Stevie Wonder into Grammy sponsor soundtrack AND the 4th Jonas Brother in the same night. That about says it all. See you tomorrow.
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Oh…my…God…that was the coolest thing I’ve ever seen…that radiohead performance….holy..wow.
I am going on a radidohead binge as of tomorrow.
Thank you Radiohead for reminding us that you’re still tops
ya know what, thom does look like clay aiken. I never really put it together before but with the marching band there I could really see the resemblance.
Haha. Now I don’t have to watch the rest!
OMG, Thom looked so bad ass and punk. Loved it.
you can accuse me of an indie bias but honestly… even YOU have to admit: radiohead’s performance = really really good.
Seeing the USC marching band up there made me think Fleetwood Mac was going to jump onstage and perform “Tusk” .
thumbs down for thom going back to his ’92 hairstyle.
thumbs down for keeping a time line of thom yorke’s hairstyle.
DAMN! Radiohead just kicked so much ass
goosebumps.
Did anyone see more Radioheads than Thom and Jonny? I didn’t!
wtf is that on Samuel L. Jackson’s head?
hearing justin timberlake sing “the homies dead and gone” is a little wrong. Homie? really?
Oh TI, you’re so laaaaazy.
you can hate all you want but j.t. might just be the most talented performer to grace the stage at the grammys.
ok, it was the best thing ive ever seen on tv. coldplay’s invisible string section can eat USC marching band’s crap.
yeah so apparently justin is singing “the old me”…still dumb though
Barack Obama receives a free plug for his books on tape
can this guy stop eating shit now
TI is the king
jamie sounds excellent
does anyone else completely detest Ne-Yo?
Radiohead > Everyone
Oh yeah, live Grammys blogging tonight. Looks like I didn’t miss anything.
“8:10 Justin Timberlake and Al Green doing “Since We Been Together” featuring Keith Urban’s surprisingly tasty licks. The Reverend still has flow. No jokes there.”
Um its “Lets Stay Together”. Stereogum stop humiliating yourselves and stick what you’re used to; faux indie band reviews and updates.
when did neil diamond become william shattner?
neil diamond hates himself
Fucking Neil Diamond’s still got it.
Why do I love the dead people montage so much?
I suppose the rest of Radiohead didn’t bother showing up…
I think Colin was back there, but I don’t think there’d really be a purpose in Phil Selway playing.
also, they had trombones do the coolest part of Colin’s playing in 15 Step anyway.
that was a really really exciting performance- Thom looked nuts, I loved it.
I hope MIA gives birth to a Lil Wayne.
wait, i just realized radiohead actually wasn’t even up for best rock album. what?
also, where’s the dave matthews guy in the dead people montage? did i miss it?
Wow, what an unexpected and nice little surprise that curtain-raising of blues dudes was. Right when you think they’re shitty, the Grammys add a 4th credible song to the show!
on the montage: No Ron Asheton of the STOOGES??!?!
damn.
rhianna doing a commercial for eye makeup. fail.
Seriously whats with all the CSI cast members?
“NOT SO LIL”
I changed the channel to a movie about go-go dancers
Well, at least it’s not ‘Prom Queen’.
New Orleans and rappers giving their social commentary about it. glad it’s still 2005
New Orleans should be doing a benefit for the music industry.
I can’t see the tv but I can hear Lil Wayne performing… Oh wow I hear somebody ripping off a nice guitar solo. I wonder if he’s been working on his guitar? Oh, no that wasn’t him, if it were Lil Wayne I’m sure he’d be strangling the neck of the guitar while doing some sort of strange fingerpicking technique I’m going to call “The Weezy”
Wayne.
Alan Thicke (Robyn Thicke’s dad, the guy on Growing Pains) must be proud
Is this the Grammys or a Lil Wayne variety show?
I don’t know but I liked his outfit for the grammys (pause)
Yes, Pepsi: the guy who wrote “My Humps” is the new Bob Dylan.
Oh big surprise, will.i.am giving props to Obama. I’m just glad that during this world economic crisis the bar isn’t set too high for a guy who has inherited a real disaster from a gunslinging buffoon. If Obama doesn’t save the world by this April my vote goes Palin 2012.
Can’t believe people can’t see the sarcasm
If Plant/Krauss win album of the year it will just cement the grammys as entirely irrelevant in my mind. I liked the album and all, but still. Herbie Hancock last year, Plant/Krauss this year? Get with the times.
at least it wasn’t coldplay
ugh
Okay, I’m gonna have to go buy this Robert Plant and Allison Krauss album because it’s winning EVERYTHING
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fouFlK23lg
The performance of the night.
That’s bullshit. Radiohead should have gotten it for best album in years…
god who let her speak
FUCK THAT SHIT.
Seriously, fuck the grammys.
Album goes to THE MOST BORING/SAFEST CHOICE EVER… as always. This is why I stopped actually watching this thing like 10 years ago!
At least Coldplay did not win over Radiohead.
Urgh. No one cares about the Grammy’s except for people in the business. And they don’t buy albums either, so…
Also, Zooey needs a bra.
what the hell? the rest of radiohead was there. it showed them in their seats. why not on stage for 15 step?
Well, at least Radiohead got the award for best alternative music album.
But FUCK THAT. They should have gotten album of the year.
Alright, the search is on for a Radiohead performance clip that will work…
radiohead vid
http://video.google.com/videosearch?q=radiohead%20grammy&oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&hl=en&tab=wv#q=radiohead+grammy&hl=en&emb=0
good to see thom yorke have “what the fuck am i doing here? is this a joke?” written all over his face…tho i would’ve preferred him to stare like this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p8uGdz0LwY8
From the NYT liveblog, re: the “Rap Pack:”
“I don?t know if they?ve settled any issues of monetary policy, but this is an otherwise excellent rap summit.”
That is so NYT.
Looks like we alreayd have worst comments of the years nominees on this thread
Radiohead did not win? Surprise, surprise, who cares? The grammys suck anyway
Most of the greatest bands of all time never won a Grammy…Sonic Youth?NO The Velvet Underground? No.
BTW, I doubt that Animal Collective will ever win a Grammy. They are simply far too good for that commercial joke of an award show.
Either that, or Animal Collective will inexplicably be nominated for “Best New Artist” next year.
No one will remember who Animal Cellectove was in a couple years so….
photo 7 and 13
i just vomited!!!!
Omitting LeRoi Moore (DMB) from the memorial was disgraceful and unexcusable. They remembered everyone from editors to cowbell players. Leaving out a past Grammy winner, and multiple nominee is pathetic.
What a joke. I imagine they were too busy listening to the “new” Krauss and Plant disc to edit the montage.
There seems to be a lot of complaints about people not winning. Let’s think of it this way. If the bands we liked actually won, then more people would buy their music and we’d have to find something else to listen to.
All I know is, Jimmy Page must be spinning in his grave.
I’m fucking alive man, what the hell?!
Sarcasm? You know Jimmy Page is alive and well, right?
I accidently changed the channel during “Swagga Like Us”. I thought I stumbled upon an episode of Maury Povich
where were the other heads besides thom and johnny?
Why is the Plant/Krauss win coming as a surprise to ANY of you? It’s the Grammy’s! Even Stevie Wonder saw that one coming!
“15 Step” on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7IMiiJRwhS0
Coldplay aren’t indie which obviously means they’re horrible =]. They sell lots of records and make music that lots of people enjoy and love, you gotta hate music like that don’t you? In response to their success, I’m going to be completely immature and cynical and post negative, unnecessary comments while listening to my Animal Collective and feeling individual. And don’t forget to include the token U2 criticisms. =]
or maybe people just think coldplay and u2 are boring because they are boring so they don’t like them.
they really pulled out the stops. that show was entertaining from start to finish (i can’t remember the last time you could say that about the grammys)…they really got great acts.
radiohead killed it. punk rock.
PFFFTTTT. Has anyone else clicked through the pictures yet? I had never previously noticed any resemblance between Joe Jonas and Amrit but admittedly in that picture…yeah, it’s there. Bwahahahahaha.
so was every post you wrote supposed to be funny? cuz I wasn’t laughing.
The last part was horrible with the people leaving and leaving stevie wonder playing thinking theres people watching him play. biggest insult.
HI, All the best for all Grammy Award Winners from http://www.altiusdirectory.com Team
I’d beat my girlfriend too if it gave me an excuse to miss such a shitfest.
I hate USC. But it was pretty cool.
I hated Jennifer Hudson in Dreamgirls. Actually, I just really didn’t like the movie. But I’m glad to she’s winning some praise, no matter how unmerited that award is.
<3 MIA. I want to eat her baby.
Eat?
You stay classy, Nancy Shevell: http://stereogum.com/archives/photo/liveblogging-the-2009-grammys_051221.html?img=9&gfmt=e
Anyone catch that C. Martin quoted The Boss’s new one, “Working on a Dream,” during the “Viva La Vida” performance?
not to add to the coldplay discussion, but..
given Jay-z was there and all.. it would have been quite enjoyable for there to be some ‘viva la hova’ .. but of course the mainstream music industry has little respect for mashups..
so did Rufus win??
i think the reason radiohead perform with only 2 members was to show that the kick a$$ even there’s only 2 of them.
That is very true.
M.I.A should have won it all. They need an Independent Grammy’s thats broadcast on FX or something with indie rock, rap country folk etc. from indie labels. Sure it would be low key but indie musicians deserve a nice gala for their creativity for all to see. I don’t have the money..someone tell someone to put on a celebration that caters to the indies man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hilarious recap of the Grammy’s here: http://www.thedumbingofamerica.wordpress.com
hilarious recap of the Grammy’s here: http://www.thedumbingofamerica.wordpress.com
Gwyneth Paltrow does not care about Coldplay people.
this is the song that should’ve gotten Lil’ Wayne a Grammy
Where were most of the big stars? Only a few showed up. Thought it’d be a big day for them.
I think the blogger must’ve been drinking. Notice how he starts to get really confrontational towards the end calling everybody bitches. I thought that was a little wierd.
i hate there sound and the band. I think they’re the most overrated band in the history of music so stop trying to say there is no possible way to hate a band.
The most overrated band of ALL TIME??? Think about that statement for a sec.
OK GUM ballers,
Riddle me this….
http://www.apple.com/trailers/independent/skillslikethis/
who is the band performing at the end of this trailer?
So I went to the Grammys this year. My dad produced/arranged Radiohead’s performance with the USC marching band. Just wanted to say that I thought they were AMAAAZING! I’m so proud of them. And, word, Thome defintely knows how to get his groove on! =) Both Thome and Johnny are the sweetest guys! And Paul McCartney
My dad could beat the shit out of your dad, it’s Thom and your music is awful, now go away!
Miley Cyrus and Taylor Swift’s duet at the Grammys ended up sounding better than i would have expected
Rufus didn’t win
What song was that during the dead people montage?
I hear it in my head but it’s too faint to make out. ;o)