This is an imaginary contest that we just made up. Before today, the all-time champion was Iggy Pop, compliments of his tour manager guy Jos Grain (example: “2 X HEAVY DUTY STRAIGHT CYMBAL STANDS. But we are equal opportunity employers, so gay stands may apply also. [They won't get the fucking job, though..."]). And actually, after today Iggy continues to hold on to that title. But second place may just belong to a boy named Foo. The Smoking Gun tracked down the hot doc in all its cheeky glory, although this excerpt was properly identified as blockquotable by Gawker.
Littered throughout the rider’s 16 pages (revised as of 4/2/08) are strict reminders not to recycle goods from “last night’s Dio show,” to make the soups vegetarian because “meaty soups make roadies fart,” and DVDs of “your choice” as long as there are no Jamie Kennedy, Martin Lawrence, or Sport titles. Now you know where Dave built up the writing chops for his Metallica epistle. Read the entire chuckle fest at The Smoking Gun.
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Genius. Especially the part about bacon.
Back in the days of Dec. 2001, my university’s concert committee put on a show that had a fledgling band named Yellowcard as the opening act. Their tour rider asked for “thousands of adoring fans”, which is truthfully one of the most humorless things I’ve ever read.
that reminds me of Jim Gaffigan’s bacon routine. “But bacon is that good. I bet if you put bits of bacon on a strip of bacon, you could travel back in time. It’s like a tasty vortex.”
Their old one had some funny stuff about not sharing a dressing room unless “it’s with Supergrass or the guys from Oasis.”
“God’s Currency”, that’s fu*king Aces! Grohl’s a riot!
actually, i don’t think Dave Grohl wrote this,
my guess is his tour manager Gus Brandt did.
way back when My Morning Jacket was opening for the Foo Fighters,
i snatched a copy of the Foo’s rider, and it was hilarious…
(there are a few “jokes” included from that version)
i couldn’t resist asking Dave about it, but he said he had never even seen a copy, and that the funny man was probably Gus.
So he was either being modest, or giving proper credit.
gus did write the rider, not dave. very entertaining to say the least,,….