R. Kelly - Trapped In The Closet: Chapter 13 Preview
In his divine providence, bless his heart, R. Kelly is treating us to another series of installments (Chapters 13-22) from the best serialized hip-hopera thine eyes have ever seen. Yes that means more from cheating Bridget and her paramour, the midget ("that shitted on [him]self"), the spatula waving neighbor, the homosexual deacon, and the other sordid figments of Kelly's overactive, sexed-up imagination. As a gift to you, the closet Closet fans, he's put together this little preview of Chapter 13. But this is R. Sylvester Kelly, so it ain't a recap without sung dialogue and a fat booty beat. Oh, shit.
If you need a refresher, here's your YouTube roadmap: Chapters 1-5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, and 12. Or, just read the Cliff's Notes. And if we're lucky, this all will yield even more installments of Trapped In The CLAUSet.
Trapped In The Closet: Chapters 13-22 will be out on DVD 8/21. You're psyched.
Posted at 3:27 PM
Tags: R. Kelly
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I like this better when it was called Blue Velvet and it didn't star R. Kelly.
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I was obsessed with the first installment of Trapped, but the latter ones just don't do it for me. R. Kelly didn't realize how mindblowingly absurd he was being with chapters 1-5 - he thought he was making a serious piece of art. After people reacted like they did, he started hamming it up and the freaky charm was all but lost.
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"he thought he was making a serious piece of art"
You mean like the pissing video?
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So excited!!!
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I agree with you occupant...once we found out the midget got bridget pregnant it just turned into a dr. seuss soap opera and the real drama was lost. I hear though theres a man from nantucket in chapter 16...i wonder where that one will go?
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Oh, shit.
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When he decides it's necessary to harmonize "oh, shit." Somebody needs to slap his hand and say, "No, R! That's a BAD R."
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I thought maybe the whole trapped in the closet thing was a joke until he brought the midget into the mix . . . then I knew it was art.
Go R. Kelly piss on me.
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Is it just me, or did R sample the sound of an incoming iChat message?
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God... hilarious. I'm so ready for the continuation of this mind-blowing saga.
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I like his older stuff better than "Moneymaker."
Oh, shit...
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Public Announcement never would have allowed this.
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So what "Occupant" is basically saying is that he enjoyed laughing at the silly black man, but that when it became clear that the silly black man was in on the joke, it stopped being fun for old "Occupant." Gold star for you, you fascist.
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Son, Time to come home and take your meds. Then we can go visit your dad at his house with bars.
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Oh shit!
Can I get a Trapped in the Closet tattoo?
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I just want that suit...
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I'm torn. I think he's a deplorable person but I love to watch his crazy music videos. Oh shit.
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LOL @ yomomma
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I had almost forgotten that hilarious beat. Oh man, it is like a dream come true that he is release this. I will be able to waste another full day of my life trying to figure out what the hell this guy is thinking. Midget inside Bridget, need I say more.
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From the looks of the midget in a cowboy outfit with a boa on and a helicopter chasing a car, this has the potential to be the greatest thing ever created by human beings.
Oh my God seriously I cannot fucking wait.
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keep doing your thang u have a wonderful gift from God so continue to use it or u will lose it.
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My excitement for this knows no bounds. Oh dear god, this is going to be amazing.
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Oh, shit.
Pastrami, it has nothing to do with race. R. Kelly is ridiculous, regardless of the color of his skin, and ridiculousness is funniest before people are trying too hard to BE ridiculous. Like the difference between the mid-late 90's simpsons and the early 2000's. Or the simpsons and drawn together. (drawn together being the unfunny version).
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You guys are right. I was kind of kidding.
The Simpsons is a good example, though, because it knew it was ridiculous--it just wasn't trying too hard, as you say. I think it would be underestimating R. Kelly to think he didn't already know he was being ridiculous, but you guys are right--he's too over-the-top now, and his last album was like the Tenacious D of neo-soul or something.
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We must remember, this is just fiction. A artist at work.
I am/and always shall be down with/for "R". His life is his own. not for me nor anyone to be critical of. I have loved his music since Born into The 90's. I like it, it's funny. Takes ones mind from the daily hussle and bussle. R, you got my vote.
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This is a recap of this preview that I did for a friend who's obsessed with TITC and who's PC isn't Youtube friendly:
OK, it starts off with Kells wearing pure white three piece suit and tie walking under a white bridge towards the camera asking you to “yo, come and take a walk with me, threw the streets of Shawtown (?), lets look back, and reminisce about all the shit that went down…” the screen then peels back and a what follows is a Kells sing-narrated TITC recap, intercut with Kells walking through a city smoking a stogy and talking at the camera. Oh, and in the fastly clipped scenes being recapped, Kells is green screened in every so often shaking his head and putting his hand above his mouth and going “OHh Shiiit!”
Example:
“Sylvester comes out of the closet, pointing his biretta” ~Kells pops up~ “OH Shiit!”
“Then Cathy finds out about Rufus’s lover Chuck, the *gayyyyyy guyyy* ~Kells pops up~ “Oh SHIT!” (note: Kells sings “gay guy” like, flight of the butterfly style, making it hilarious!)
“Next thing they know they shot his brother Tron *just a lick* ~Kells pops up~ “Oh Shit!”
After the recap, Kells (still in white) apperates on a street and starts walking towards the camera and a guy in a brown suit is walking away from the camera. As the pass, Kells drops an unidentified object (keys?) into brown suits coat pocket, then the camera pans and we see that brown suit is actually Kells also (who would have guessed, especially from the cornrows…) and white suit Kells sings “so far that’s how the story goes, and now its time to continue on, so get ready, here’s chapter 13..” (Couldn’t he have made this rhyme?)
Then, the camera flashes with a bunch of quick images, like boom, boom, boom. They are, in order:
-A old man in bed and the old neighbor woman with the spatula looking out the bedroom window,
-Two gangsters in a Hummer,
-a woman with a towel on her head screaming,
-a cute waitress in short old-time waitress outfit shaking her head,
-Kells (Sylvester?) in sunglasses walking threw a nightclub with lights flashing and chicks dancing up on him,
-a bare-chested midget in a red boa wearing a cowboy hat and leather vest talking on a corded phone (HA!),
-Kells with his biretta out at what looks like a restaurant, a guy and a chick in a 70’s Chrysler green-screened into what looks like a high speed chase (helicopter and all),
-Kells standing across a desk from a bunch of mafia looking white guys (the fat guy seated at the desk is eating what appears to be spaghetti…I’m guessing he’s Italian? That’s subtle…),
-Kells looking around panicked with seven guns pointed at his head,
- 2 stereotypical pimps (loud suits of purple an yellow, hat with feather, sausage curled hair, you know…) standing in front of a gospel chorus and a preacher with a mic,
-a young guy in a suit sitting on a golden thrown in front of the gospel chorus laughing (God?),
-Kells’s face in a smoky room (the restaurant?) sitting at a booth,
-a woman looking surprised in bad blonde wig smoking a cigarette in the smoky room (the restaurant?) on the other side of the booth from Kells.
What do you think will happen?
I personally hope Kells gets to meet God…..
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My goodness four R.Kelly's at once?....NO!!!!...lol.....His mind i s very sick and creative... but why did he have to take it to the church
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the midget was def the tipping point..lol...but love it or hate you most likely will still watch it...i know i will..LMAO "OH SHIT"..
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Whoop Whoop RKelly just made my day!
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Can I just say the Robert "piss on me" Kelly is a damn fool?? Its like a car wreck; you know you shouldn't look, but can't look away...
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um, so traditionally i see something involving r.kelly and generally just ignore it. therefore, i have not been privy to the first 12 installments of the closet saga. so, my question to everyone here would be...is this serious? like, is this supposed to be serious? i mean, it isn't right? its definately some sort of parody of...something right? please tell me i'm right because if this is supposed to be some sort of serious musical/drama/gangsta story i'm going to jump off of a bridge...i feel like i'm forgetting something...
oh yeah, "aw shit"
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I'm a huge Kels fan. For all you haters saying dumb negative stuff, go hate on somebody else. He's an artist who's not taking this project seriously which is doing exactly what it's meant to do, now, make us laugh. The mass majority of artist are suppose to switch it up every now and then. How many other artist of the last 15 years has been able to sustain their relevance & keep making hot shit regardless of situations and or haters. Chi-town C
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ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh shittttttttttttttttttttttttt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Please I kno 12yr olds who can write better shit than this old retarded as crazy mess...any one can sing about drama over a melody
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Whatever the circumstances - whether he's talented or just singing redundant words over music, the bottom line is - he's getting paid!
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Okay R. Kelly is out of control! That was so wack! It's like he is saying anything to make the words rhyme......R. Kelly used to be very talented and wonderful. AND now i"m so over it.....Is anyone else laughing at the wack like back ground and graphics of this thing!
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Where's Isaac Hayes when you need him?
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FYI, chapters 23 - infinity may be called "Trapped in a Jail Cell"
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20070802/people_nm/pornography_rkelly_dc;_ylt=Aqhf.tnua3WT3SUvpdBF5rADW7oF
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Oh Shit!
Now what in the hell made you go dig up Public Announcement out of the woodwork? Are they even making any tracks? roflmao
I'm with oh boy, stop hating on R. He's a creative artist and he's getting paid to do what he do? That's why yall all keep watching it, listening to it and discussing it because you really LOVE IT! Another Chi-Town Resident
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all you chi town residents should stop being so gay and giving r. kelly props and start showing those first place cubbies the respect they deserve!
c-u-b-s
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R. KELLY IS A STUPID NIGGER. I HOPE THE ARAYAN BROTHERHOOD PISSES ALL OVER HIM IN PRISON.
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Oh Shit... and if you watch closely @ the end... why is superhead in the new ones? WTF... maybe she slept with the midget then Kells... then Bridget... then Rufus... Then Chuck... Then theh next door lady... then Tuan.... Then wrote a book about it...
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omg, this has got to be the best thing since sliced bread?
Every chapter is just amazing, hes a real live legend its the most amazing thing ive ever been amazed by.
The story is great, i love it
R.Kelly you are a living legend peace man and respect to your singing man you rock and this is the best ever.
peace man
your great
peace
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I dont care what no body say. I have been waiting for this for a long time. I will be in the store to buy this shit. R is the greatest of these times.
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HEY MAYNE THIS IS THE TIGHTEST THINNG I HAVE EVER WITNESSES IN LIFE. R. KELLY IS THE UNDISPUTED KING OF R & B AND NO ONE CAN EVEN COME CLOSE TO TOUCHING HIM. I HOPE EVERYTHING TURNS OUT IIGHT WITH HIS CASE AND HE CONTINUES TO DO WHAT HE DOES CAUSE IT WOULD BE A SHAME TO STOP SOMETHING SO SPECIAL...
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I can't wait to see this. I never took any part of "Trapped" seriously, despite what critics may have said. I always watch it as a joke and usually turn it into a drinking game. Every time he pulls out his gun-take a drink, every time he makes a ridiculous rhyme like beretta and dresser-take a drink...etc. He takes it so seriously and it's soooo awful. I love it! Midget....pose...Midget....pose...Midget...pose.... "Trapped" should be the world's newest antidepressant.
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To all of the people out there hateing on trapped in the closet...... if you ever watched ANY of R-kellys music videos you will see that this is what he loves and is known for. Plenty of drama and a wierd twist to everything. If you dont like it then dont watch the next one...After all no one made you watch the first one did they? Or did you think that it was gonna be an underage teen filled porn? R-kelly is a comedy lover himself so if you thought the first trapped in the closet was supposed to be serious you were wrong. I have loved R-kellys" work from the begining when he made "I cant sleep" and "down low" why should he change it up now. I do however think maybe he should have had a little Ron Isley cameo in it. I personaly cant wait for the next one to drop.
So again to all the hatters, I dont think R'Kelly's gonna broke if YOU dont buy it.
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I love R Kelly. This is gonna be hot, from beginning to end. It's so many ppl hatin out there, wishin they was makin that bread and lookin that good. You ppl need to get a life and grow up. Yall know that this is bangin, if you really wasn't interested you wouldn't have watched it from the beginning. Kels keep doin your thang cuz This is why your "COLD" and they're not. Love ya man
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YA'LL SOME HATERS!!! FOR REAL!!!
DON'T HATE CONGRATULATE!!! :)
WELL ALL I KNOW I LOVE R.KELLS
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My mother is obsessed with this. She makes everybody watch 1-12 if they havent seen it. She has memorized all the words. She made me come to this website to view this preview of 13-22. I introduced her to this and I am wondering if I did the right thing. Im sure she will be at best buy 8/21 when they open. All I have to say is R.Kelly has created a monster.
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I love the Multiple R. Kelly's going "ohhh, shit"
This is genius
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man r.kelly is a beat i just want to know when the other half come out Im waiting
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I have been waiting like others to see what he would come up with next. To all the haters who read in to this drama kells has wrote grow up and if it was so stupid why in the hell are you all on here trying to see what he has put together? i think deep down inside you really admire R.KELLY thank you for your time
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i love r.kelly and i love chapters 1-12. cant wait to da rest come out so i could see it. and i will be da first one to go by it. and u bets to beileve it. so keep da good work up.
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TRAPPED IN THE CLOSET CHAPTER #13 WILL PREMIERE ON IFC TV SUNDAY, AUGUST 12 AT 11:20PM (est/pst).
ALSO ON SUNDAY, AT 10:45PM (est/pst) IFC TV WILL AIR AN EXCLSUIVE INTERVIEW w/ R KELLY.
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it,]<allgood
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it"allgood
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You can check out new chapters 14 and 15 at IFC.com... they roll out a new chapter everyday!
www.ifc.com/trapped
Oh sh#t!!! :) haha -CG
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I'm surprised anyone thought R Kelly meant these to be taken seriously.. I'm pretty sure Kells has always known that he was funny.
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I love Kells and I don't care with anybody says. I will be at the store on the 21st asap. To all the haters find some one else to hate on like. Like my boy Money Mike says, thats your job so do it dammit.
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Hey I don't care what nobody say, Can't nobody tell a story like Kelly.
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hey kell's... I like what you did with the trapped in the closet and i will like this the chatper 13- 24 and it will be a different people on there too... and i like the one with chapter 1-12 and rufus wife was sleeping around and her husband rufus was sleeping around with a gay guy and they started to argue with eachother... and that was so funny shit... and the midget got bridget pregnant and cop asked the midget who paid him not to tell and so the cop's wife answered him that she paid the midget to not to say nothing....
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r.kelly i luv what you did with the trapped in the
closet, it is tight. i can't believe it.
YOU ARE A GENYUS.
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i luv trapped in the closet.
i luv you r.kelly
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I THINK R. KELLY IS GREAT. I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE NEXT SEGMENT. ALL OF YOU TALKING JUNK HAS A CHOICE TO WATCH OR NOT.
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I THINK R. KELLY IS CREATIVE. IF YOU DON'T LIKE THE SEGMENTS DON'T WATCH IT. I KNOW I WILL BE GLUED TO THE TV.
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Hey He Really Bring Me Back with The new Ones
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R.KELLEY YOU ARE A GINIUOS MAN AND TALENTED GIFT FROM GOD. CONTINUE TO DO WHAT YOU ARE DOING. THOSE WHO ARE JEALOUS LET THEM CONTINUE TO DO SO.
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WHAT CAN I SAY? U R THE BEST IN WHATEVER U DO. U ARE A DAM GOOD SINGER AND PREFORMER. THEY ALWAYS TELL ME TO HATE THE GAME AND NOT THE PLAYER. ALL I'M SAYING IS KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK AND LET NOTHING AND NO ONE TAKE U DOWN.
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He's gorgeous and talented. What more can you ask for???? I love everything he does.
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so excited!!!
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dang you always be locked up in jail and its like you being nasty to some kids.
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I CAN NOT WAITE UNTIL I GET TO SEE THE WHOLE THING 13-22 IT'S GONE BE HOT I CAN ALREADY TELL
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man this movie is hecka scary for me! like the part the gun icident and the hospital and the migeat thing oh my god!
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OH SHIT in 3 part harmony is hilarious!! Omarr makes for a scary cop. So far we have Bridgette, a midget, a gay pastor, lesbians, the package and the mob. What's left? Aliens?
This is so original and great!! Go on with your bad (no, really ... he's bad) self, Mr. RK!!
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the truth i aint got much to say but just that i have an army feeling R Kelly from Nigeria(Africa). the truth the man is dam good and talented.
you all can keep hating but for real av been with him all the way from born in the 90's till date and am still loving everything he dose no matter how wacked you think it is.
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r.kelly is da man and shuld b given crdt 4 a brilliant job which i bet none of u haters can achieve.
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WHAT IS THE PACKAGE???
HONESTLY I'M LOVIN IT ALL..AND I CAN'T WAIT UNTIL HE COMES OUT WIT 23 AND SO ON!!
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man yall hatter lets me see you come up with some sh** like this r is the man
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R kelly is the bomb, cant wait to see whats next
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dude wat is the damn package im going freakin crazy
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Ilike this better than everything eles it beautiful
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I not feeling the package!!! What is the package.
And a brod picks up the the phone phone phone. oh my god a rubber rubber rubber
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I think you are the most gifted man i have ever heard and to be more honest you are the only true r&b artist out their so don't stop what your doing and don't let no one tell you that r.kelly is not one of the best, better yet the best r&b artist out their. I love you as a man first and forth most and i love you for the your creativity and the music that you keep fresh each and every time. Can't wait to hear your baby making CD I know it going to be the shit.
With love and respect
YOUR BIGGEST FAN TANISHA A.K.A BUNNIE
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Kels you are the only man I would cheat on my husband with. You are one of most sexest men alive and your musi just make me want to !!! oh my GOD do nasty things to you. damn I just want to meet you for only one night.
Damn, Damn
Damn,!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
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oh shit!
This is some serious shit.
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this is to all ya haters out ************* coz 4 tha record in your own sorry life time u haven't even sang a single sentence and guess wat you haven't even moved your own grandma.......so pliz give Kel's a break he don't all ya haters chewing on his history in tha making drama.
You can't tell him nothing if you have no one sing along your song as they walk down the street lanes of mother earth........biggest crazy fan 4 Kel's.....clivetich
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R KELLY YOUR A BAD MOTHER FUCKER MY TWO SON'S WANT TO RAP I SAID IF YOU CAN BET R KELLY THAN YOUR A BAD MOTHER