Radiohead Insanity Continues On Craiglist
Scalper prices for the band's small venue tour are skyrocketing. (Stereogum says save your money and see 'em at Bonnaroo with a hundred other great bands.) BUT, if you just can't wait 'til Tennessee, there is a deal to be found on Craigslist. You just gotta be this asshole's date...
FREE Radiohead Ticket GA for one lucky hot mamasita!!
- $1
Reply to: sale-158220096@craigslist.org
Date: 2006-05-06, 6:44PM EDTHey,
I'll be straight up honest. I bought 2 GeneralAdmission (they're selling for 300 and up each on sites) tickets to Radiohead. I happen to be the only one of my friends who likes Radiohead (they're all nice little Jews who listen to Z100 or nothing). I'm also a big fan of meeting new people. I'd be willingto take a date to the concert for the fabulous price of NOTHING (-did he say nothing??? -Ummm, yeah, and he even wrote it in caps locks so you'd be sure to see it -Oh, ok then). I'm a 23 year old guy from Brooklyn, and I'm just totally cute (enough) and charming (in that interesting kind of way)and all that stuff.I'm giving a great deal here, so I do require one thing, I know I'm shallow, but for some reason I LOVE hot girls, I mean i friggin like them so much more then unattractive people. It's terrible, I know,
I'm an awful human being, I slap myself every night in shame, and try to cry out the mis-guidedness (sort of a word) but the next morning I wake up the same way, it's a curse of some kind. So send me a pic if you're interested and I would gladly do the same (you shouldn't have to hang out witha leper either). In fact, I think it would be best if you get through the critical screening process that maybe we meet a week or something before the concert at a big public bar in the city, just so we can get all akwardness out of the way before the concert so there will be NO SURPRISES (get it????Oh my god, yes!)(as I said before I've got nice Jewish friends, we can have a group party!! And if we hate each other (definitely a chance) then we can go our seperate ways and never acknowledge each others existence for the rest of our waking lives... fun!).Does our misogynist ticketmaster think he's on J-Date? Does he think anyone will actually take him up on this offer?! Does he have a Hitler hairdo? "(get it????Oh my god, yes!)"So take a look at yourself in the mirror, and if you honestly think you'd talk to yourself at a bar (that's before having 5 drinks), send an e-mail my way.
Send e-mails direct to: RADIOHEADATMSG@hotmail.com (this is a new address, I haven't been using it the past 5 years in anticipation of making this offer... though that would be awesome in some kind of deranged sort of way)
Posted at 3:59 PM
Isn't this kind of listing pretty typical w/r/t sought-after tickets?
Anyway, I don't think this guy is necessarily a misogynist ... just a big time loser.
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> Isn't this kind of listing pretty typical
> w/r/t sought-after tickets?
Pretty typical. Always pathetic/entertaining.
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That is by far one of the funniest e-mails I've ever read! I can imagine a similar write-up in the local classifieds: "Single white Kid A in search of his Kid B. Offering free Radiohead ticket. Must love depression and Orwell. Are you 'so fucking special' enough? Please, no robots."
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what is wrong with this? he sounds a bit weird/jerky, but he wants to take a hot girl to a concert. he's not asking for head. if i was a hot girl i'd go for it, why not?
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i saw chicago tickets going for $800-$1000. fuck. who's going to buy those?!?
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All those parentheses started to get really confusing. You'd think if he was REALLY shallow he'd get right to the point and not let us in on all his Kevin Arnold-esque aside thoughts
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Nice one - I got my Radiohead tickets for their one gig in Ireland for about €60. And I have one spare :)
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luckily what will probably happen is that he will choose this picture:
http://cache.boston.com/bonzai-fba/Original_Photo/2005/06/20/1119280934_8953.jpg
...and be suprised at the concert when he meets this girl:
http://www.escort-victoria.co.uk/assets/photos/d25.jpg
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I wonder how many drafts he went through on this.
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Now some fire bitch is going to go with him just to blog about it. Nice assist, Stereogum.
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this email was utterly verbose. i will summarize this, thus giving people the essence of what i just had to sift through:
dear hot bitches,
i, shameless average white dude, will give you a ticket to see radiohead if you pretend to like me for an hour. maybe less. as long as i can stare at your boobs. email me.
yours in pr0n dreams,
white dude.
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Imagine how cruel he would be if he had all the girls meet him at once and he picked one in front of them? I wouldent put it past him. He also has that much trouble meeting women he has to give them a 1,000 dollar ticket. I'm sure he is really a looker...
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Typical self-obsessed Radiohead fan.
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whatever, this is brilliant.
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Yeah never been into Radiohead. Idiotechque is a bit suicidal.
http://www.musictimes.com.au
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ahahahahahaha that is great.
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anyone heard if they could possibly be adding more dates? radiohead is pretty much my favorite band, and i've been waiting for this tour forever, and they aren't coming anywhere NEAR oklahoma. no texas shows? not even kansas city? this makes me sad. :(
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Basically he is asking for TWO dates, and not just one. So he's not just a loser, but an imposter as well.
Makes me glad that I'm not a huge fan of Radiohead ;)
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God, if you're gonna write an article about me and call me an asshole Jew (i understand that those are 2 seperate accustations making it clearly not anti semetic) then at least post my e-mail address to help my cause:
RADIOHEADATMSG@YAHOO.COM
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I love how he is such a loser he can't even locate a "hot" Radiohead fan within his (immediate) circle of "friends".
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OH man, he's like a seinfeld Jew. The worst. They can't stop cracking jokes about stupid shit and thinks cause everyone likes Seinfeld and he's got the same sort of humor they like him but they don't know that since Seinfeld is on TV they can laugh because he's remote and if they knew a real life Seinfeld they'd hate his ass.
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Ummm, Kanye west... you call yourself Kanye West!I may be the worst type of Jew, but what are you? Some white boy who pops his collar up, and wears sunglasses when you go to clubs, and a Santa hat at Christmas parties, and wear power suits like that guy in "Hitch", and claim to like Aqua Teen Hungerforce because everyone else is laughing, and still think the Numa Numa guy is funny, and wear a sweatband when you work out, and always wash your hands after you go to the bathroom, and don't consider yourself gay, because you were drunk when you hooked up with him, and he only fingered your asshole and not the other way around, and I mean you kind of liked it, but whatever, it wasn't like he went down on you? Is that the kind of guy YOU are? If so, I have a GA ticket for Radiohead at MSG on 6/13 with your name on it... don't forget the Santa hat.
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is this how you people want to spend your lives? ouch.
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in 1998, i took a hot jewish chick to see radiohead at radio city music hall - front row center, i might add. she's now my hot jewish wife and we now have a kid on the way. so if you think hatin' on that kid is funny, i'm living proof that the ploy works! that and i'm jewish!
assholes!
ps to the kid giving away the ticket: don't let the bastards grind you down!
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at least he's not trying to scam some radiohead fan for ungodly sums w/ his extra ticket. some people are apparently trying to buy cars with the proceeds from their scalping. I saw one front row ticket going for $3,500.
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Doesn't he at least get some points for being a Radiohead fan? I mean, I could see being harsh on him if he was going to a Coldplay concert, or a Travis concert, or any other band that makes it's living ripping off Radiohead... but an actual Radiohead fan? That should be worth a couple points, at least.
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like you wouldn't whore yourself for radiohead tickets.
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if that guy wasn't so damn creepy i would have considered it. hahaha just because i LOVE radiohead. he's probably fucking creepy as hell...that guy i mean.
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Oh yeah - like Thom Yorke isn't way creepier.
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elimidate!
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JQ! aka HELLAGOODSTAR at myspace. OOOHHHHH, look at me, I have a rose in my hair in the opening picture. I wear A Little Mermaid t-shirt for the sole reason that it's cool to wear retro t-shirts for the past 4 years. I probably also have one that says Crest with a picture of toothpaste, and another one that says Mr. Clean. Oh, what else can I assume about me? Look at me, I wear red lipstick. This is my attempt to be punk, or an artist. Talk about creepy a punk artist, eh. Oh my god! One time, I had a lesbian experince because Claire Fisher did it on 6 feet under, I vomited for weeks, but still, I did it and that's the only thing that's important in the world... that and creepiness. AAAAAHHHHH CREEEEEEPYYYYY!!! Oh God I need a cigarette I just need it so bad, I'm not level without my cigarettes, I totally don't do it because I think people will find me cool, I do it because I LOVE them sooooo much. Oh God, Cancer? Bring it on, it's a conversation topic. "Dude, what happened to your hair?" "Are you kidding? It's the newest spring fashion trend. Geez, to quote smashmouth, finger and a thumb with the shape of an L on your forehead." "I hope the cancer eats you alive."
Please note: All comments were not meant to offend. 1) My dad had a cancer- he's a survivor!
2)I watch six feet under
3)I saw the little mermaid in theaters. I wanted to see back to teh future part II, but my parents like my little sister more.
4) I hate cigarettes. period.
5) Punk Artists from Maine really do suck
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Oh piss off the lot of you, youre all just jealous you a) didnt get the tickets or b) dont have the initiative to bag yourself a hot girl to go with you at the same time. The more you complain, the more he laughs: he's not only going to see radiohead, but is also going with a hot girl, and is now a minor celebrity. Am i wrong? Bet he's had hundreds of applications..
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Pete,
You are a wonderful man. I am possibly the most brilliant man of the generation and it's just taking the world a little while to figure it out. It is true, the ladies are comin' a flockin'. They want me (especially if I was in the form of a ticket). If I could take one man, it would be you, but sadly I won't be taking a man. As for Scott, the poster of the article, every morning when I pray to my loving, generous God (without him I would have no ticket... and no life for that matter) I pray that when the day comes to give out terminal diseases, he chooses the absolutely most painful one he has on you. That's right, I'm talking about Climidea. The disease so gross, no one know can even come close spelling it (unless you have it- so don;t try funny business Scott, b/c then we'll know). So just to put it in perspective:
1) Pete- have an awesome day
2) Scott- be stricken with a terrible (yet amusing) disease.
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even better:
http://newyork.craigslist.org/mnh/tix/159632606.html
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And if you thought THAT was nuts, check out THIS guy:
www.theneuroticjew.blogspot.com
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For the record, I would sooo go with this guy.
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