Rock Is Dead (Again)
It's that time of year again, when the likes of Mark Marford proclaim rock dead. Marford's claim seems based on how much the MTV VMAs sucked, but what else is new?
Oh yes, make no mistake, MTV is now owned by the cheeseball bling. "Diddy" hosted the VMAs and he was tedious and small trying to be mutinous and large. The show was a comical cavalcade of overblown Vegas-grade hip-hop artists, 50 Cent and Nelly and Kanye West and all of 'em screaming "Yo boyeee" and grunting their manhood in these low slouchy gorilla tones apparently mandatory for hip-hop cred, and far be it from me to give a damn that the bloviated hip-hop persona has overtaken the outlandish rock persona as the emblem of cool, but it seems worth mentioning that the most glaring and telling and godawful thing about it all, the most disquieting aspect was just how far the true rock 'n' roll spirit seems to have fallen in the cultural strata.MTV hasn't stood for "music television" since record labels started making their money re-releasing LPs on CDs, and CDs have since been rendered obsolete by the MP3. But saying "MTV isn't 'rock and roll' anymore" is like saying the selection of tapes at the Virgin Megastore sucks.
But it's not just rock on TV that's suffering- it's dinosaur arena rock, too. That might be because there's a looming shortage of aging rock stars whose best days are behind them who can get away with charging $350 a ticket.
Posted at 1:54 PM
Morford should never again comment about music. He's got very little credibility but, unfortunately, an audience.
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P.S. Jed, the CD has been rendered obsolete? Please. That's something Morford would write.
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I just meant as an industry cash cow. I'm sitting in a bathtub filled with CDs as I type this.
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re Marford: Oh spare me the crap that is the "true rock n' roll spirit." I hate elitists, particularly when they think they are being populists. And really, why is the overblown rock attitude better than the overblown rap attitude? Is it perhaps the colour of the performers is less to your liking, asshole?
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Rock may be dead, but Morford is one of the worst offenders of the English language. Everything in his bloviated column is about sex, orgasms, the gay, sex, getting blown, oral sex. Did I mention sex?
And he makes sex very borrrrring.
He equates everything politial to some kind of sexcapade. Everything he does in his life to sex.
Did I mention sex? I don't think I've mentioned it enough. Sex. Yes, Morford loves sex.
It's rather TMI, but the idiot owners of the SF Chonicle love him and promo him daily. When he's not on the front page they promo him with flash ads.
Did I mention sex yet?
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I liked his caption about the VMAs where he says "Because what the world needs now is more pimping."
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Typical rants from people who consider rock and roll four guys with guitars, bass and drums. Despite its resurgence in this "pure" form from time to time, this type of rock and roll has (thankfully) morphed into hundreds and hundreds of sub-genres, none of which MTV gives a damn about. I consider hip-hop an integral part of the family tree--but all genres have their flashy, bloated practicioners, the latest versions featured during Marford's funersl.
The "dinosaur arena rock" phenomenon is indeed sad, financially capitalizing on the hazy memories and platinum credit cards of those now most concerned with 401(k)s and lawn care.
Great post, Jed--showing that, indeed, "rock and roll" as Marford believes it, isn't dead yet at all, but perhaps someone should put it out of its misery.
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Thanks for the memo...
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"yo boyeee"??? Does Flavor Flav even say this shit anymore?
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Rock died when Chuck Berry was convicted.
That was a long time ago.
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Baby Boomers: The Least Greatest Generation.
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Let's see...when has rock "died" in the past:
1. by 1960--Elvis in Army, Chuck Berry in jail, JLL married cousin, Little Richard in the clergy. Dick Clark enters picture, Chubby Checker and Fabian take over charts.
2. by 1970--Beatles no mas, genres begin mutating. Folk is now "singer/songwriter," the political becomes the hyper-personal. Rock begins growing in scope--glam, prog and metal form "arena rock," now referred (un-ironically) to as "classic rock" by MOR radio station programmers.
3. August 1, 1981--MTV premieres, reconfiguring "rock" as favoring visual style over musical substance, which had never previously been approached in any form. David Bowie, Screamin' Jay Hawkins, Alice Cooper arch respective eyebrows.
4. 1981--The Human League release "Dare", with track "Don't You Want Me," reaching #1 on the pop charts--the first wholly synthetic song to do so.
5. 1986--Run D.M.C. reconfigures "Walk this Way." Rick Rubin strokes his beard.
6. 1995--Lenny Kravitz releases single "Rock and Roll is Dead." Rock rolls over in its grave.
7. 2002--Puff Daddy invents the remix.
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good lord.
how effing racist is this little turd?
'low slouchy gorilla tones?'
wtf is that about?
but it's totally cool to get up there in tight brown corduroys and some too-small 'ironic' t-shirt (unwashed, of course) with a bad case of bedhead whining about not getting laid by the girls they're infatuated with just because the poor lass made the mistake of buying pavement's 'crooked rain' reissue.
no wonder kids are running towards those 'gorilla tones.' at least gorillas know how to HAVE FUN - something humorless 'rock' idiots forgot way back when they first caught herpes from that crew slut in the ’80s on the warrant/poison tour.
and then for him to put in all on mtv like they have some sort of responsibility...
whatever. the next time i'm in sf, remind me to bitch-slap this loser a couple of times. because he is a bitch. with a small dick.
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dude sounds like a total racist, who knows nothing about music. Guess what, rap is more exciting than rock right now. suprise.
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dude
rap is bullshit. you actually need to have tallent to play rock
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no way in hell is rap more exciting.....rap music is is currently the most formulaic, bullshit, uninteresting nonsense to ever "grace" the top of the charts...it more closely resembles the WWF (or I guess it's WWE now) than it does some sort of musical genre.
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I always find it strange that people assume that the mainstream, Top 40 stuff is the real deal when it comes to other genres. Here's a list of the current top 5 rock singles in order.
Photograph, Nickelback
Right Here, Staind
Doesn't Remind Me, Audioslave
Remedy, Seether
Stricken, Disturbed
If I were a rap fan, I'd totally say that rock is ridiculous and lame. My point? Real rap fans are likely listen to the stuff that's in constant rotation on the radio is about as often as you or I might listen to Nickelback. They're probably listening to some stuff the uninitated rap fan will have never heard of... It stands to reason.
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very good point, janine.
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Amen to that, janine.
(In fact, personally I can't stand the chart-topping rap songs and would consider myself far more of a rock fan . . . but guys like Saul Williams have caught my ear, so I've learnt that there's certainly some great rap out there despite how I had previously thought it "wasn't my thing" . . . it's just that vast chasm between the good stuff and the plays-on-MTV stuff).
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Saul Williams ... yeah, music like that definitely proves the maxim, "Hip-Hop that gets played on '120 Minutes' and apppeals primarily to NYC hipsters is fucking dreadful."
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He liked Rockstar INXS? Yuck. Please, let rock go underground. That's how it gets good.
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Yo, Rockstar INXS Rules! Don't make fun of my show.
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Rock is dead because it's just not interesting anymore. Don't blame hip-hop. Look at rock music. It is filled with flacid acts like Sum 41, Good Charlotte and Simple Plan. These are just boy bands with guitars. These so-called rock acts (and many others) could easily be played on easy listening stations.
Unfortunately, there is no real rage or rebellion that usually makes for great rock and roll. Moford just took the easy way to make his case for the lack of decent rock music.
Rock will come back when there are enough decent rock acts to support any sort of attention.
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I thought The White Stripes were saving rock n' roll. No wait - that was Ryan Adams' job.
So what happened there?
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Oh shit I can't stop laughing.
Morford's pining for the lost days of Guns 'N Roses and a coked-up Steven Tyler? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Ahhhh ha ha ha ha! I really can't stop laughing, the lost days of Guns 'N Roses. Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
pining
n : a feeling of deep longing
Seriously, am I the only one laughing hysterically at this?
Can't you just see him on the couch at home? Stroking his copies of Use Your Illusion 1 and 2. Pining.
"Oh what has happened to Rock and Roll? I remember the good old days when rockers wore things like kilts and running shorts with the Stars and Stripes on them. They wore Abe Lincolnesque hats atop their bushy mop."
"They wore spandex and tied scarves to their microphones. Oh how I miss thee."
Ahhh ha ha ha ha ha!
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Rock is simply dead and the other styles are just barely surviving. People got DVDs and video games now, no one cares about music anymore eccept the older generation.
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