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April 10, 2007

Video Hangover: Asia - "Don't Cry"

Every week, we dig in the archives for videos that we find noteworthy, memorable, or just unbelievably stupid. And then, we break 'em down for you. Why Video Hangover? Because when you watch as many videos as we do, you're going to feel it afterwards.

"Don't Cry"
Asia, 1983

A few things to think about while you're trying not to cry during this video...

In the director's cut, Carl Palmer plays Chewbacca
Given that it was 1983, some of the effects in this video are genuinely well executed. Others -- not so much. On the plus side, we have the handcuffs that come out of the wall, the realistic knockoff of the Star Wars cantina, and the cool stone-is-actually-water showstopper. On the minus side, we have the jungle that looks like the houseplant section of a Home Depot, the comically un-scary skeleton, and John Wetton's outfit, which makes him look like a cross between a WWI general and a gay Han Solo.

Allow us to introduce you to Steve Miller and his band
Here's to you, mysterious pyramid lady. Sure you use more eye makeup than the Ultimate Warrior, and yes, sometimes you like to wear your full burka to the local bar, but we have we have nothing but respect for a woman who entertains herself primarily by luring members of Asia to their death.

Emerson, Lake & Palmer + Yes + The Buggles + King Crimson = wtf??
Maybe our definition of "super" is a little more stringent than AllMusic, but we never quite got it when people referred to Asia as a "supergroup" -- until we saw this video. Really, Asia was more like a group of super heroes. They climbed mountains, crossed deserts, hacked through jungles, and searched for mythical treasure. Of course, they also got burned, drowned, trapped in shackles, and thrown off cliffs. And in that way their exploring was much like their music: mildly exciting in places, but ultimately not worth the trouble.

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Posted at 12:11 PM in ,




8 Comments

Oh yeah, definite hangover from this one. I don't think I caught this one EVER. And I am a child of the 70s and 80s. They sure don't make them like this anymore.

Posted by: Young Punk at 04/10/07 12:44 PM  | Reply
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This must've come out during the height of Indiana Jones, obviously. It's a great video and a lot of fun. Thanks for posting it. I'm a total sucker for a good 80s video. They used to be like mini-movies. I miss that.

I don't think I've heard it in 20 years. Totally forgotten. Oddly, I still know most of the words. This catchy earworm is going to be stuck in my head all day.

Posted by: Michele at 04/10/07 1:24 PM  | Reply
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hey you neglected to mention the upcoming supergroup ASIA reunion tour scheduled for this summer!! ol' middle-aged men rock!!! :P

Posted by: mundaneDan at 04/10/07 1:35 PM  | Reply
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WTF? Picking this over "Only Time Will Tell" is a crime. Gymnasts and Video walls, a formula for success!

Posted by: abstracto at 04/10/07 3:02 PM  | Reply
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Oh my lord. And you didn't even mention the fact that John Wetton delivers each line with all the passion of a corporate training video –- all while wearing the world's first and only pair of leather sans-a-belt.

Posted by: David at 04/10/07 11:13 PM  | Reply
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d'oh thought this was a g'n'r video

sadness

Posted by: joe at 04/11/07 6:49 AM  | Reply
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Oh my gosh, I agree with Michele, however, for the most part, not a fan of 80's videos, some yes, for some odd reason, I remember the words to this song and many others. Weird.

Posted by: Liz at 04/11/07 8:41 PM  | Reply
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I am still upset about Asia. My friend Freddy and I—big Yes and Steve Howe fans—got tickets to the Asia concert in '83 before we had heard any of Asia's music. Steve Howe! Then he got the album and came over and we listened to it. And my heart broke.

Posted by: Ben at 04/15/07 3:38 AM  | Reply
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