Step 1: Light your candles (candle holders should be silver), let burn for 15 minutes, fill your chalice with wine, and dress in your ritual robe.
Step 2: Place your pumpkin in front of you and invoke the Four Crowned Princes of Hell. (Satan to the east, Beelzebub to the north, Astaroth to the west, Azazel to the south.)
Step 3: Recite the Invocation to Satan. (In Nomine Dei Nostri Satanas, Luciferi Excelsi, etc., etc.)
Step 4: Read your prayer to Satan (you can write your own or find one on-line) and offer your blood sacrifice.
Step 5: Meditate.
Step 6: Close with shouting “HAIL SATAN.”
Step 7: Enjoy your Halloween pumpkin!

(Via LaughingSquid.)