Headline Of The Day: Zac Efron Freaks Out After Being Photographed Near An Array Of Dildos
First of all, Zac Efron, relax. You’re not even in focus. They were clearly trying to photograph the man behind you and then you had to dramatic chipmunk your way into the picture, as USUAL. But, OK, that is a good headline, so let’s just get into it. From the New York Post (via FilmDrunk):
Zac Efron was mortified to be caught hanging out at “Fantasy World” sex shop in NYC yesterday – even though he was just filming scenes for his new movie, “Are We Officially Dating.” When he realized a photographer had caught a picture of him surrounded by an array of glowing dildos, Efron immediately halted shooting and rushed out to chase down the pap.
“Zac was begging the guy to delete the pictures,” an eyewitness tells Page Six exclusively. “He kept telling him that he has so many young fans and he didn’t want them to see it.” The photog refused, so his reps were quick to publicize the news that it was simply a scene for the upcoming romantic comedy.
Wait. What? I guess if Zac Efron had rented out Fantasy World all for himself, beginning of Sweet Home Albama style, and was caught shopping for a “glowing” engagement dildo to propose to his own butt, then maybe it would make sense that he didn’t want his “young fans” seeing a photo of that. At the very least, it would be embarrassing. Their (his and his own butt) special moment ruined by the PAPS! But if it’s just a scene from his movie, then aren’t his young fans going to see him in the movie? In a sex shop? Talking to the toys? (I assume that is what the scene entails. A pair of pasties explaining why they don’t tip in restaurants.) Also, uh, this part:
But this isn’t the first time Efron has been caught in a similar situation: Back in 2008 he and then-girlfriend Vanessa Hudgens were photographed shopping for a blow-up sheep sex doll in Los Angeles.
A BLOW-UP SHEEP SEX DOLL? This article is WAY too casual about that detail. If I was in charge of the news, this article would be 50,000 words longer. It would start out almost exactly the same, but when we got to the blow-up sheep sex doll, it would turn into a Pulitzer Prize winning exploration of what the hell that is even. But I am not in charge of the news. I am barely even in charge of my own life. It is time to start making some lists. For me and Mr. Efron. 2013 is our year, Zac!