lindsay: as you know, I'm sick to death of the subject of the AD movie
lindsay: and would rather never mention it
lindsay: but this is just the first time I've really disagreed with you in a while
gabe: how can you disagree with me?
gabe: you can nitpick about details
gabe: but the idea that it's impossible
gabe: for the arrested development movie to be bad
gabe: is naive
lindsay: No. Nobody said that.
lindsay: It's totally possible for it to be bad.
lindsay: But you really think that the Arrested Development movie is going to be bad if it's like The Simpsons movie?
gabe: so your only issue is that i cited the simpsons
gabe: take me to jail, doctor
lindsay: But the simpsons movie was a success that they couldn't posssibly hope to achieve, by every possible metric
gabe: my point in citing the simpsons movie is that movies of TV shows are disappointments, and i do think that movie is a disappointment
lindsay: they will be so lucky if they please 1/10th of the fans as much as the simpsons movie did
gabe: it's not that the movie was bad
gabe: or that it was financially unsuccessful
gabe: but that i left the movie feeling like "yup, sure"
gabe: "that was a long episode of the simpsons"
gabe: which in itself is a show that i think
gabe: has far outlasted its usefulness and should be taken off the air
gabe: it is done
gabe: and i think that the arrested development has a way different goal to reach than the simpsons
lindsay: Well, yeah
gabe: the simpsons is a monster international marketing juggernaut
lindsay: it has to bring in a lot of people
lindsay: who never saw the show
gabe: and it can make a "good" movie
gabe: that is basically just a long episode
gabe: and no one will care
gabe: because next week they will see epsiode nine billion of that show
gabe: because it will never die
gabe: and the whole thing just chugs along like a tank
lindsay: but as "meh" as you were about the simpsons movie, they could only dream of that
gabe: but the arrested development MOVIE has a lot riding on it
gabe: in terms of being a worthwhile endeavor
lindsay: also, sex and the city, as shitty as the movie was, was one long episode of the show that seemed to please fans
lindsay: (not being a fan, I can't say)
gabe: um, that was a terrible movie
gabe: and that is a stupid show
lindsay: yes
gabe: so i don't see your point
lindsay: well, it was a movie of a TV show that still pleased fans of the tv show
gabe: ok?
gabe: i'm still confused
gabe: i pointed out five ways in which the arrested development movie could become a disaster at worst or a disappointment at best
gabe: none of them are realities at this point
gabe: it's all speculation
gabe: the movie doesn't exist
gabe: but i think that my five points are all valid
lindsay: I'm just saying that if you're holding the AD movie to a higher standard than what was accomplished by the simpsons movie, you will definitely be disappointed.
lindsay: I don't even think there should BE an AD movie.
lindsay: As you know.
gabe: but nothing was accomplished by the simpsons movie
lindsay: I mean, whatever, fine
gabe: except making money
gabe: i don't think that the simpsons movie improved
gabe: anyone's opinion of the simpsons
lindsay: I'll see it, but I don't think it makes much sense
gabe: it was just a thing
gabe: the simpsons movie was just a thing
gabe: and yes, i do hold the arrested development movie to a higher standard
gabe: isn't that the whole point of enjoying that show?
gabe: that you want more?
gabe: out of the world?
lindsay: a higher standard by every metric of success as a tv-to-movie film?
gabe: they are not the same metric
gabe: you are comparing two totally different things
lindsay: I think AD will be a success if it's well reviewed only
gabe: in the same way that comparing the sex and the city movie to the ad movie makes no sense
lindsay: you compared it to the x files
gabe: yes
gabe: that movie was a total disappointment
lindsay: I was an x files fan (ew) and I fell asleep in it
gabe: i also think you're just taking me to task about the simpsons movie
gabe: because you found one detail that you disagree with
gabe: in a much larger argument
gabe: and we can sit and fight about the simpsons movie all day and i still am right on all of my major points
lindsay: So what does the AD movie have to do to make you think it's a success?
lindsay: be your favorite movie ever?
gabe: i don't know what the AD movie has to do for me to think its a success
gabe: taht's the fundamental problem with there even being an AD movie
gabe: the bar is basically impossible
gabe: i've never suggested that i was excited about the AD movie in the first place
gabe: i hope it's great
lindsay: Well
lindsay: What are some possible plots?
lindsay: or INCITING INCIDENTS
lindsay: I think they should go to Hawaii
lindsay: for real
lindsay: or around the world in 80 days
lindsay: these are basically all jump the shark ideas
lindsay: someone should have a BABY!
lindsay: But since it's AD, it's ironic!
lindsay: they should just do every jump the shark thing
gabe: i am glad that you are not in charge of the AD movie
gabe: that thing already has a steep enough uphill climb
gabe: without Shark Jump Magoo over here
lindsay: You know who should be in it?
lindsay: Ellen.
lindsay: They should go on Ellen.
lindsay: actually, I think they should do all of these stupid ideas
lindsay: because you have to have limits in order to be creative. so the movie will be better if they have to work around fucking having to go on Ellen in the movie.
lindsay: I really believe that.
gabe: just to clarify
gabe: your creative philosophy is that you have to work in a way to go on Ellen. always.
lindsay: no, but, like, I think they should make a list of five stupid things
lindsay: that have to be in the movie
lindsay: and work around them instead of just starting with infinite possibilities
gabe: the arrested development movie is not your sophomore creative writing class, lindsay
lindsay: even words. five words.
gabe: take it easy Writing Down The Bones
gabe: well, what is YOUR hope for the AD movie?
gabe: you are an AD fan, what would satisfy you?
lindsay: well, obviously that it's good, but that it's very different from the show while maintaining the show's sensibility
lindsay: maybe something that can be taken on two levels
lindsay: but I would want the bottom level to still be really smart
gabe: what i am hearing is that you want the movie to avoid all of the things that i suggested it avoid
gabe: that is what i am hearing
lindsay: um
lindsay: being bad or disappointing, yes
gabe: what i am hearing is that you think that i am the best
gabe: and that you apologize
gabe: to me for even bringing this up or ever quesitoing me about anything ever
lindsay: Exactly.
lindsay: I'm so, so sorry.
gabe: no apology NECESSARY!
lindsay: hahaha
gabe: lindsay, you know that
lindsay: hahaha
lindsay: omg you know who is probably so excited about this movie?
lindsay: the blue man group
gabe: haha
gabe: "BACK ON TOP"
