Looking Good, Anne Hathaway!
Whoa, check out Anne Hathaway’s cool new hat! What a cool hat. Mrs. Cool Hat over here. She’s so low-profile. People are like “whoa, is that the actress Anne Hathaway, star of movies?” but then they shake their heads, “No way, can’t be, her face is too hidden by her lingerie hat.” What is even going ON here? Like, I know that there is this weird tug-of-war going on where celebrities complain about the paparazzi while simultaneously having their publicists call the paparazzi and tell them that they are going to the coffee shop. And I am sure constant public attention can get tiring at times. But, like, even normal people will often LOOK IN THE MIRROR BEFORE THEY LEAVE THEIR HOUSE. Just do a quick head check! “Let’s see, I am wearing socks and underwear and pants, check. Shoes? Yup. Check. Swoop neck top? Got it. I’ve got my make up looking cute today, thank you Veronica, you did a great job on my make up! How’s your son?! Did he get the espresso maker I sent him for his fifth birthday?! OK, make up check. Any food in my teeth? No. Great. I think I’m all ready to go. Oh, whoops, hahahah, I almost left the house wearing this impossibly embarrassing mega-visor lingerie hat. Take that off. OK, world, here I come!” Something like that. Isn’t she married? I’m not being some kind of gender normative monster by saying that if I had a wife and she wore that hat I wouldn’t let her leave the house. Not because I am the man and I am in charge but because WE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE BEST FRIENDS AND FRIENDS HELP EACH OTHER AND GIVE THE HONEST ADVICE EVEN WHEN IT IS HARD TO HEAR. Good grief, Anne Hathaway. You are already pretty unlikeable. Just lose the hat, dude. Speaking of Anne Hathaway and poor fashion choices, the Oscars are this Sunday, at 100PM! (Via TheSuperficial.)