New Michael Jackson (Feat. Akon) - "Hold My Hand"

Michael's still hugging and rearing children (he said "rearing children"), Akon still loves throwing them offstage and dry humping them onstage, and that's why I get so moved when I hear them sing the lyric "hold my hand" in this... CONTINUE READING NEW MICHAEL JACKSON (FEAT. AKON) - "HOLD MY HAND"»

Posted on July 1, 2008 (83 comments)
Tags: Akon | Michael Jackson

Craig Ferguson Speaks Tepid Jokes To Power

Craig Ferguson's keynote address at the White House Correspondents' Dinner Saturday night lacked the teeth of Stephen Colbert's performance two years ago, and wasn't nearly as embarrassing as the famed Karl Rove Does To Hip Hop On Stage What Akon... CONTINUE READING CRAIG FERGUSON SPEAKS TEPID JOKES TO POWER»

Posted on April 28, 2008 in Politics (5 comments)
Tags: Akon | Craig Ferguson | Karl Rove | Stephen Colbert

Akon Covers Michael Jackson

The media circle jerk over the 25th anniversary of the bajillion selling Thriller isn't what it would have been perhaps if the mouthpiece and danceman for those tacks hadn't devolved into, well, whatever he is these days. But we certainly... CONTINUE READING AKON COVERS MICHAEL JACKSON»

Posted on December 5, 2007 in Video (5 comments)
Tags: Akon | Michael Jackson

Kidz Bop 12: As Always, Mostly Inappropriate

Today's the day! The twelfth installment of the music series for the kids, by the Kidz, is ready to be streamed and/or purchased for $18.98. And per usual, you really shouldn't be buying this for anyone...... CONTINUE READING KIDZ BOP 12: AS ALWAYS, MOSTLY INAPPROPRIATE»

Posted on July 31, 2007 (19 comments)
Tags: Akon | Avril Lavigne | Fergie | Kidz Bop

Pete Wentz Offers His Side Of The Fall Out

Pete Wentz wants you to know the internet is full of shit. At least when it comes to the account of how he ended up in a fight with a hometown heckler at an afterparty at Schubas. His side of... CONTINUE READING PETE WENTZ OFFERS HIS SIDE OF THE FALL OUT»

Posted on June 13, 2007 in Video (10 comments)
Tags: Akon | Fall Out Boy

Akon's Presidential Aspirations Dashed By 24

SPOILER ALERT: If you haven't made it to Season 5 of 24 just yet, best to shift your gaze elsewhere. Akon, who serves presently as youth issues ambassador to Senegalese President Abdoulaye Wade, was set to one day run a... CONTINUE READING AKON'S PRESIDENTIAL ASPIRATIONS DASHED BY 24»

Posted on February 20, 2007 (3 comments)
Tags: Akon | Coldplay | Leonard Cohen

New Gwen Stefani Video - "Sweet Escape"

In November we told you we loved half of The Sweet Escape. Namely its infectious title track featuring Puru Nacka Lu Lu Lu. In this brand new vid, poor Gwen's been incarcerated for atrocious crimes to hair! She sure sexes... CONTINUE READING NEW GWEN STEFANI VIDEO - "SWEET ESCAPE"»

Posted on January 10, 2007 in Video (26 comments)
Tags: Akon | Gwen Stefani

The Etymology Of Akon

There's a Wiki-feud brewing over the true meaning of Akon's "full" name, and Squidpants has been studying it closely. He writes:so Akon is apparently pretty funny guy. He's a Senegalese-American rapper who I like, and in interviews he's been saying... CONTINUE READING THE ETYMOLOGY OF AKON»

Posted on January 8, 2007 (10 comments)
Tags: Akon | Wolof Profanity

Premature Evaluation: Gwen Stefani - The Sweet Escape

From what we've read, Gwen Stefani was preparing an EP of L.A.M.B.'s bananas-lite leftovers. Pharrell thought they could pull off a full-length sequel. And that's how The Sweet Escape was born. Inspiring, right? Album two offers more of the same,... CONTINUE READING PREMATURE EVALUATION: GWEN STEFANI - THE SWEET ESCAPE»

Posted on November 27, 2006 in Premature Evaluation (12 comments)
Tags: Akon | Gwen Stefani | Keane | Pharrell

Akon Hearts Bobby Vinton

Thanks to Senegalese rapper Akon, '60s crooner Bobby Vinton can now afford braces for his daughter. Akon - "Lonely" (MP3) 2005 [Link Removed] Bobby Vinton - "Mr. Lonely" (MP3) 1964 [Link Removed] Vinton, who doesn't own a computer, is tickled... CONTINUE READING AKON HEARTS BOBBY VINTON»

Posted on April 14, 2005 (17 comments)
Tags: Akon