Two days ago the world rejoiced because Morrissey had apparently joined Twitter. Not so, explains Morrissey. In a post on the fan site True To You, despite bearing the trusted verification checkmark, the @itsmorrissey is “bogus.” Let’s turn it over to Moz:

I would like to stress that I do not have either a Twitter or a Facebook account. I gather that a Twitter account has been opened in my name – as ‘It’s Morrissey’ – but it is NOT Morrissey. I do not know who has opened this recent Twitter account, but please be aware that it is bogus. That’s, of course, if you should remotely care.

Untwitterably yours,
MORRISSEY
Salt Lake City
15 May 2014.

Presumably somebody in the Morrissey organization is going to get a stern yet colorful talking-to about this. We should’ve known something was afoot when the account started kicking out tweets like these…

Follow, follow, follow. Twitter is the perfect metaphor for…something. Dunno what.

— Morrissey (@itsmorrissey) May 14, 2014

Have you seen the album + autographed book bundle? It won’t be available for long. http://t.co/IcrCrL7obH

— Morrissey (@itsmorrissey) May 15, 2014

Are you joining us on the tour? http://t.co/6wIY6Qj8GT

— Morrissey (@itsmorrissey) May 15, 2014

If we don’t at least get a song called “Untwitterably Yours” out of this, I’m gonna be pissed.

In related news, Dallas Observer reports that Morrissey and band are all planning to wear PETA Meat Is Murder T-shirts at next week’s concert because Texas is America’s leading producer of beef products.

UPDATE: The @ItsMorrissey account has been closed.