Spider-Man / Spider-Man / Does whatever a trailer can / It’s the Spi- / -Der-Man Trailer / We’re gonna watch the Spider-Man trailer / LOOK OUT! / Here’s comes the Spider-Man (trailer)! Yay! We did it, we wrote the opening to the trailers post and now we’re done with that part and we’re never going to look back, yay!

The Amazing Spider-Man 2

It was a bad call to open this trailer with something that was vaguely reminiscent of Eminem’s “Lose Yourself” and then not have that go into Eminem’s “Lose Yourself.” You learn that in first day of trailer school, I’m really surprised this one got it wrong. Anyway, though, do you know that Dane DeHaan is married? If you google “Dane DeHaan married” it comes right up. Huh. Was going to give this trailer 5/5 stars before those search results came in but now it looks like I’m going to have to dock it 1.5 points. That leaves it with a 3.5/5. Too bad. Still looks good though!

Tracks

This looks beautiful. I don’t think I will see it, if I’m being honest, but if it comes up in conversation I will say, “That movie looks beautiful. Sunburn, though — eeek.”

Back In The Day

This looks beautiful. JK.

In Secret

ELIZABETH OLSEN! What a god damn beauty. Listen, sometimes to make a sex omelette you have to break a few Tom Felton comb-over eggs. It’s fine. Relax, girl, enjoy it!