In a recent interview with Vanilla Ice, the conversation turned to the upcoming Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle reboot. Of the kind of role Vanilla Ice would like in this movie, he says: “Anything, somewhere in there. Michael Bay’s doing this one, it’s huge!” But the interview wasn’t always so sunny. Please, be warned that what you’re about to read is upsetting, and might push you over the edge of the emotional pain the human mind can comprehend and withhold, if you were already placed precariously on that particular edge. It’s rough out there. And Vanilla Ice isn’t even talking about the time Suge Knight held him outside of a balcony by his ankles in order to force him to sign away his publishing rights to “Ice, Ice Baby.” From Moviefone:

While chatting with the rapper (a.k.a Robert Van Winkle) about his new TV show, “Vanilla Ice Goes Amish,” he was ecstatic about the upcoming 2014 Michael Bay “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” project. A self-proclaimed “Ninja Turtle at heart,” when we asked him if he’d like a role or cameo in the new “TMNT” he practically jumped out of his chair.

“Hell yes! ‘Secret of the Ooze’ is the highlight of my life and I’ll never top it!”

I’m sorry, I know that the words pull your heart through your stomach until your entire being feels like it’s rushing to the core of the Earth, and you might be wondering why I shared them at all. But the fact is that you can’t ignore everything in life that seems too difficult to handle. Remember that life can be dark, but even in its darkest and most difficult moments, there are people out there who love us. Hug someone you love today. Our hearts and minds are with Vanilla Ice. (Via FilmDrunk.)