If the religion you practice brings you any sort of peace in this world without forcing you to do harm to anyone else (or yourself), then by all means you should practice that religion. I think that is broad, but close to fair enough. But if the religion you practice brings you some sort of a definitive sign that you are one of its true chosen followers, a sign that you AT FIRST thought meant you had won some sort of snack food contest but, after confirming that no contest had been going on, decided meant that God was trying to speak to you? Through the snack food? So you called the local news and they did a segment on it because Heaven knows the local news needs something to break up all the stories about local death and the things that could be killing you right now? And Heaven also knows that God didn’t go through all of the trouble of placing a little Goldfish cross on your Goldfish cracker so you could keep that shit to yourself? That would be very hard to pass up!

POUNDS OF GOLDFISH EVERY WEEK?! Maybe God is trying to tell you that you should EAT LESS GOLDFISH! My goodness, lady! There are other snacks! (Thanks for the tip, werttrew!)