When you spend so much time looking at and talking about a handsome famous person and his penis, you never really expect the penis I mean the penis argh, ha-ha, I mean the penis the handsome famous person to actually talk back! This thing has a brain + feelings to match? Next thing you’re going to tell me is that famous people feel bad when you stand outside of their car and shout their name, WHICH I KNOW CANNOT BE TRUE! From Rolling Stone:

“Most of it’s tongue-in-cheek … But it is a little rude. It just speaks to a broader freedom that people feel like they have — a prurience. They’re called ‘privates’ for a reason,” he says. “I’m wearing pants, for fuck’s sake. Lay off. I mean, it’s not like I’m a fucking lead miner. There are harder jobs in the world. But when people feel the freedom to create Tumblr accounts about my cock, I feel like that wasn’t part of the deal … But whatever. I guess it’s better than being called out for the opposite.”

Well if he doesn’t want us to look at his penis, why doesn’t he just wear some of that underwear Jennifer Westfeldt bought him?! HE’S CLEARLY ASKING FOR IT! JK. JK JK JK JK. (It’s funny because the world is a nightmare full of sweaty monsters!) Respecting everyone’s private-part-privacy is a two way street, I understand that. I hope you enjoyed your last guilt-free look at Jon Hamm’s private part, which is called a private part for a reason, ladies and gentleman. It was fun and while it lasted, but we’ve all been #BUSTED. But whatever, I guess it’s better than being called out for the opposite. (Not obsessing over a celebrity’s penis? I don’t know! I lost the thread!)