Lindsay Lohan’s New Mug Shot OR Puppies Swimming?
Lindsay Lohan was booked by the Santa Monica police this morning following her appearance in court yesterday where she plead no contest to some stuff who cares it is the true HEIGHT of not our business. And TMZ got their hands on her new mugshot. Congratulations to TMZ and to all of us. Incredible news. Important use of time and energy. Human beings doing what they do best: being thoughtful, patient, forgiving, and kind to one another! (That’s the TMZ tag line, I’m sure.) Here was my favorite (not favorite) part of their post: “By our count this is mug shot #6, that we’ve seen. Another was taken in NYC last year, but since NYPD doesn’t release mug shots … we got robbed.” YEAH! THEY GOT ROBBED! Give us what we DESERVE, New York Police Department!FUCK DA POLICE! Holy moly. Like, it is one thing entirely to get seduced by the gross and sticky business of modern celebrity culture in America. We all do it to some extent or another, and if we don’t do it, that’s not any better. People who claim to not have ANY idea about celebrity culture are just as bad as people who say “Actually, I don’t own a TV,” and as we all know those people are the worst. But to claim that somehow YOU are the victim because somewhere in the world a sad woman’s mug shot has not been released to a vulture media with a blood-smeared beak is INSANE and BUMS ME OUT. But hey! TMZ is a popular website read by millions of people with its own daily Television show and bus tour so what the fuck do I know? Probably nothing, as usual. But, so, now I leave it up to you. You can talk about Lindsay Lohan’s new mug shot and how it compares to her five other mug shots, or you can post pictures of puppies swimming. I have my own feelings on what I think would be the proper course of action, but those feelings will continue to be bottled up inside of me. You do what you want, man. Life is for the living.