IT IS HERE, IT IS HERE, IT IS FINALLY HERE! The starting lineup for Puppy Bowl IX is here. The nation’s Most Valuable Puppies. At nine years old, the Puppy Bowl is literally one of America’s longest running traditions. And thank God up in heaven that it is. She really blessed us this time. Of course, each year it gets harder and harder for the young players to stack up against the tremendous athletes that came before them. No puppy has ever been able to achieve the levels of Schroeder, the greatest puppy to ever play the game. But it’s fun to watch them all try. I heard that this year there were going to be hedgehogs in the halftime show, so WELCOME TO OBAMA’S SOCIALIST AMERICA. But we can’t let something like Communistic French Hedgehogs get in the way of enjoying one of the most important events in American herstory. So, get in there, see who’s playing, vote on your favorite, vote on your LEAST favorite (there are some real dogs in this year’s lineup ding ding ding we have a winner!) and program your DVR’s so that you don’t miss a second of Puppy Bowl IX while you are flipping back and forth between this and the EXCITING PEPSI COMMERCIALS.