One day in 2007, I had the idea for a parody music video: “Crank That Daniel Plainview.” The idea was that I’d wear a fake mustache, some long johns, and white plastic-frame sunglasses. I’d write “Daniel” in Wite-Out over one of the lenses and “Plainview” over the other one. And I would rap, in a Daniel Plainview voice that I thought I’d perfected, over the “Soulja Boy (Crank That)” instrumental. Everyday, I feel intense gratitude that I never saw this thing through to fruition. (Or even through the half-formed “it might be funny if I did this” idea.) But even if I had, it would’ve still been better than this. This week’s picks are below.

5. Years & Years – “If You’re Over Me” (Dir. Fred Rowson)

All the post-apocalyptic pretensions are fun, but this might be a more effective video if it was just straight-up lip-syncing and dancing. Because it’s really good lip-syncing and dancing, and everything else feels a bit like a distraction.

4. Mourn – “Fun At The Geysers” (Dir. Mourn)

This album cycle, it seems that Mourn have hit upon a new video aesthetic: Immaculately designed old-timey sitcom capers. It suits them! And they’re good at it!

3. Mitski – “Geyser” (Dir. Zia Anger)

The dramatic goth version of Coldplay’s “Yellow.” This is not a complaint. (I have no idea how two consecutive videos on this list ended up with the word “geyser” in their titles. This is a freak accident, not me trying to make some kind of oblique point about geysers.)

2. Arctic Monkeys – “Four Out Of Five” (Dir. Ben Chappell & Aaron Brown)

I still don’t like the new album, but “isolated and sad rich-guy lothario who may or may not live in space” is a great look for Alex Turner.

1. Anderson .Paak – “Bubblin” (Dir. Calmatic)

In which Anderson .Paak blows so much money, so quickly, that he has bought himself two extra pairs of arms before the video is over. Absolutely glorious absurdity that could only ever exist in music-video form.