Shut Up, Dude: This Week’s Best Comments

long ass beat intro

YELLOW DIAMONDS LOOK LIKE PEE PEE

I think it's a packet of small bear shaped cookies that come with a cup of sugary goo to dip them in, similar to Dunk-a-roos.

I got you, @sandro.

Normally, David and Kristin would’ve still been awake watching TV in the living room at that time, but they decided to go to bed early that night so they’d be well-rested for the Metallica concert.

In other words, their lifestyle very nearly determined their deathstyle?

Even after all the build-up, all the expectation, and all the external factors making me need this gig in a way that could only lead to a disappointing anti-climax, the Scissor Sisters show was still everything I wanted it to be.

Multiple outrageous costume changes! Visuals which ranged from Oklahoma country roads to seedy New York nightlife to 80s late night public access TV to abstract cyberpunk dystopias! Nicola goddamn Roberts of Girls Aloud coming out to guest-duet on “Take Your Mama” seemingly just cos! Confetti and streamers and a sprinkles-ball mascot eating Bridget Martin at the show’s end! Del Marquis doing a rag time jig in “I Can’t Decide”! Gigantic blow-up tits! Maximalist hyper-sexual camp queerness on an arena-scale.

And it’s supreme fun, obviously! The band commit to exaggerated caricatures on-stage so there’s a lot of drag and cabaret-influenced schtick, trashiness, and double/single-entendres between songs. They’ve wisely chosen not to try and replace Ana Matronic, instead splitting her responsibilities between two of Jake Shears’ backing singers from his last solo tour, and they embody the spirit without feeling like facsimiles. Shears sounded great in the few times I could hear him over my own singing (cos you know I had to try hitting those high notes). Del was my big surprise; even after decades of living with that first album, I didn’t realise he was so capable of stealth-shredding like a motherfucker!

They never mentioned Trump or the current transphobic hellscape in the UK outright, but the sentiment of defiance through dance was clear throughout. Jake introduced “Fire with Fire” by noting that, whilst it’s one of his favourite songs, he’s “sad that it’s become relevant again.” The three ballads off of Scissor Sisters functioned as yearning eulogies - “Mary” got stripped down to just Jake on vocals, Babydaddy on piano, and Del on acoustic guitar and it was goddamn beautiful. And the encore kick-off of “Filthy/Gorgeous” turned into a rousing protest statement with Bridget practically snarling her spoken word interlude.

And, god, I felt that in my core. I went with my two best friends by my side in full dress and femme make-up, and I felt like me for the first time in I don’t even know how long. Maybe ever? Despite pre-show fears – as much as I tried to make it a glib joke of “don’t wanna get hate-crimed,” I was worried about being harassed or worse by randos either at or between the arena because it really is getting that bad over here – I felt safe, protected, unbothered, unjudged, and even cute (hence the new profile pic). I nearly cried at “Mary;” just caught myself trembling out of nowhere during the first “oh-oh-oh” and was prepared to just go at any point after. I went into full rave ecstasy at the “Invisible Light” breakdown. And doing the “Let’s Have a Kiki” choreography with my friends, I felt weirdly strong and free, like nothing in the entire universe could possibly bring me down so I was able to put my entire self into dancing without shame.

Sorry for going extra-long and self-indulgent even my standards. I’m just so purely happy whenever I think back on this show.

She canceled due to confusion. She thought it was a prAIde festival, celebrating Queer machine learning perspectives. Learning it was just a regular human Pride festival put her off entirely.

This is not my beautiful son-in-law

These are bad lyrics because they come across as lazy and uninteresting, but not any lazier than what I would expect from this kind of band. They are also super mild and this controversy seems very stupid and fake.

why would i joke about this

upvote if this should be a weekly column