On Oct. 9, Stereogum received an email from Ben Barnett’s attorney that included a denial of Rila Ogawa’s accusations. “Without addressing all of Ms. Ogawa’s outrageous claims, my client categorically denies that any ‘grooming’ occurred, and there is absolutely no evidence of any ‘inappropriate sexual advances,' or sexual harassment towards any of Ms. Ogawa’s bandmates,” it reads. “The facts of this matter are that Mr. Barnett never propositioned Ms. Ogawa for sexual relations of any kind; they never had any physical contact of any kind, nor was any such contact ever initiated by Mr. Barnett; and neither Ms. Ogawa, nor any of her bandmates were ever propositioned for sex or physical contact in any manner by my client.”
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Yesterday, Rila Ogawa, leader of the young Las Vegas screamo band Febuary, accused Ben Barnett, frontman of the veteran Portland emo group Kind Of Like Spitting, of grooming and sexual manipulation. As Lambgoat reports, Ogawa writes about her experiences with Barnett in a 23-page Google Doc linked on her Instagram story. She writes:
I am very scared to post this. I’ve been scared to post this for a very long time and sharing my story wasn’t even an option until recent thought. It has been eating me up for months now, even making life harder to live. Seeing Ben have support from so many impressionable people, especially young women, not knowing his true nature. I will not be silent any longer. For the last couple months of my life, I have been struggling mentally after what I went through knowing Ben Barnett.
Ogawa claims that she reached out to Barnett as a fan last year. She says that they started talking more and that he invited Febuary to record at his home studio. She includes screenshots of texts in which Barnett makes comments about her appearance: "I always wondered if you were low key modeling or caming... Fucking sign me up for the vip room homie." Ogawa writes:
I never sent him any suggestive text messages, I would respond after he would make comments like these but only because I didn’t know what to do or say. I feel disgusted with myself to even know I read these messages and didn’t see anything wrong with them, I just thought he had a twisted sense of humor or something.
Ogawa goes on to describe "Ben telling me how one of his past students was accusing him of grooming, and how he was 'innocent'." She says that a Febuary session at Barnett's home studio ended after Barnett yelled at the band.
Both Kind Of Like Spitting and Febuary were booked to play at the second incarnation of the Las Vegas festival Best Friends Forever in October. In her Google Doc, Rila Ogawa writes that her fear around Barnett "has been getting worse over time, especially getting closer to Best Friends Forever fest. I am scared to be at the same festival as my groomer. I am even more terrified at the thought of young impressionable fans going up to him as I once did without knowing how he really is."
As Lambgoat reports, the Best Friends Forever organizers announced on their Instagram story that Kind Of Like Spitting have been removed from the festival bill: "Kind Of Like Spitting will no longer be performing at Best Friends Forever. We will be announcing an updated lineup shortly."
On his own Instagram, Ben Barnett responded to Rila Ogawa's allegations yesterday. Barnett apologizes to Ogawa "right or wrong" and says that he's ending Kind Of Like Spitting: "All shows are cancelled and the new record is the last record. Probably that I will ever make... I will speak my truth and show my receipts as well, but not now." Here's his complete statement:
With the accusations against me in mind. I want to do what's right. Always have.
I do not in this moment have a "rebuttal" at hand.
But I can tell you what accountability looks like for me in this moment.
Kind of like Spitting 1995-2025
All shows are cancelled and the new record is the last record. Probably that I will ever make. There has been overwhelming hatred toward me and it seems like what needs to be done to own my life and my experience as well as honor my accuser, is to work toward whatever restorative justice looks like.
Out of sync and context I see what you see. No excuses. Shits a horrible look. I will speak my truth and show my receipts as well, but not now.
Now I want to apologize to Rila right or wrong and be accountable for my mistakes.
I hope knowing I will no longer be making or performing art brings some peace to the people who feel let down.
If you or someone you know has undergone sexual abuse, please visit rainn.org or contact the National Sexual Assault Helpline at 1-800-656-4673.
