Resistance truly is futile. For decades, Jack White has waged rhetorical war against the evils of advanced technology. He likes the old stuff, the handmade stuff. White evangelizes for vinyl and records on vintage analog equipment. In the past, he has banned phones from his live shows. In 2019, White insisted that he has never owned a cellphone: "I’m an anomaly, and I’m looking at everybody, and to me everyone sort of looks silly." He also theorized about new kinds of invasive tech: "Maybe it’ll turn into implants. Probably, it’ll turn into a microchip behind our eyeball or whatever." Well, it's almost time to sign White up for the microchip behind his eyeball, since he is now the proud owner of a smartphone device.
On Wednesday, Jack White celebrated his 50th birthday, and he got a nice present from his wife, Black Belles leader Olivia Jean. White has been on Instagram for a while, so perhaps this was inevitable. He marked his birthday and his new lifestyle change by posting a funny series of photos in which he goes from suspicion to acceptance very quickly. The slides almost work like a flipbook. Hopefully, White can figure out how to make Siri respond to "Hello Operator." Here's what he has to say about it:
Well y'all it's either all over for me now or just the beginning. I am now the reluctant owner of a cellular telephone for the first time in my life! A lovely 50th birthday present courtesy of my gorgeous and thoughtful wife Mrs. Olivia Jean (who took these photos as well.) I've been saying that my days were numbered for years, can't listen to my music in my car, can't park at a parking lot by myself because of QR codes, etc. etc. and I guess Olivia decided to be kind and put me (and all my loved ones) out of my misery! I thought if I could make it to 50 years old at least without ever having one that I could be proud of myself, and I am. Can't wait to talk to you all soon. My phone number is the square root of all of our combined social interaction times Pi.
Jack White spent his birthday at a Detroit Tigers game with his friend John C. Reilly, who threw out the first pitch and who stars in his new "Archbishop Harold Holmes" video.
did they just become best friends??jk, they already were pic.twitter.com/tQDb9pl1gc
— Detroit Tigers (@tigers) July 9, 2025
After the game, Jack White, Olivia Jean, and John C. Reilly met up with Slim Jim Phantom (Stray Cats' drummer) and his wife Jennie Vee (Jack White's cousin and Eagles Of Death Metal's bassist), Patrick Keeler (the Raconteurs' and Afghan Whigs' drummer), and Elvira (Mistress of the Dark).
Modest Mouse frontman Isaac Brock was born on the same day as Jack White, which means he turned 50 yesterday, too. But we don't know what presents he got.
Happy 50th birthday to Isaac Brock and Jack White
— Stereogum (@stereogum.bsky.social) July 9, 2025 at 3:54 PM
