T-Pain Defends Mark Zuckerberg Collab, Tells Haters To Look At Birds

T-Pain Defends Mark Zuckerberg Collab, Tells Haters To Look At Birds

Yesterday, T-Pain and Mark Zuckerberg got together to release a song, and I guess we’re supposed to think that’s funny or epic or whatever. It’s an acoustic dorm-room joke cover of Lil Jon & The East Side Boyz’ crossover crunk classic “Get Low,” with Zuckerberg singing through heavy Auto-Tune. T-Pain does the Ying Yang Twins parts. This was the stuff of a classic Stereogum no-text post, and the only appropriate response is to roll your eyes and keep it moving. But T-Pain would like us to know that it’s honestly really OK that he did this.

Yesterday, T-Pain defended his Mark Zuckerberg collab. In an Instagram video, Teddy Penderazzdown said:

It is impossible for some people to have fun. And let me tell you something, I understand that… And that fucking sucks, but I will tell you: The next impossible thing is for you to stop me from having fun. I’m gon’ fucking have it, baby! I’m gon’ live my live, and I’m gon’ do what I wanna do because I’ve learned not to care what y’all talking about!

Hey, fair enough. Is it fun to make crunk parodies with Mark Zuckerberg? That doesn’t sound fun to me, but I’m not T-Pain.

But wait, T-Pain wasn’t done! In another video, he continued:

When I do songs with known drug dealers, when I do songs with motherfuckers with actual murders on they goddamn hands, when I do songs with motherfuckers that’s known scammers, when I do songs with motherfuckers that brag about all the bad shit they done done in they life — “That stuff is fire! That shit hard! That’s that real shit! That’s that real street shit right there! That’s what the fuck I’m talking about!” When motherfuckers actually doing something good in they goddamn life, then all of a sudden I need to distance myself. Shut the hell up! Shut up! Shut up! And for all the people that’s talking about “we doing bad out here,” it cost zero dollars to go outside and fucking look at birds. It cost zero dollars to go do that shit! You ain’t got to do good to fucking enjoy your time on this earth! Do something, man!

I know what you’re thinking: T-Pain has definitely made his point. He’s said everything that he needs to say. We may not agree, but T-Pain has thoroughly addressed this matter. No! He’s not done! Here’s another video!

That last thing that I keep seeing people say: “Aw T-Pain, we got jobs out here. We ain’t got time to be having all this fun and climbing trees and looking at birds.” [Dramatic zoom-in] What the fuck you doing on your phone right now, looking at T-Pain? What the fuck are you doing? Go do the thing that you say you ain’t got time to do other stuff for! What the fuck are you doing? How the fuck did you see all three of these videos? That’s three minutes of your motherfucking time you ain’t actually doing the shit you said you ain’t have time ’cause you gotta be doing that thing. But no, you have three minutes to look at my dumb ass? Go do the thing! Go do the thing! Why you ain’t doing the thing? You at work right now? You at work? Why you on the phone? Hey! Boss person! This motherfucker on the phone! He ain’t doing his job! He watching T-Pain! He ain’t doing the motherfucking work he said he was so busy doing!

Unfortunately, it is my job to look at videos of T-Pain on the phone. Fortunately, that’s probably more fun than looking at birds. Anyway. We’re losing the thread here. In his own significantly less entertaining post, Mark Zuckerberg says that “Get Low” was playing at the party where he met his wife. I’ve seen The Social Network; the timing checks out.

In other news about Mark Zuckerberg’s married life, the BBC reports that he recently commissioned a fake Roman statue of his wife. Also, he would like to congratulate Donald Trump, and he is looking forward to working with Trump and his administration on all the great opportunities for our country.

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Finally, I’ll take the opportunity that to remind you that this isn’t the first time T-Pain helped a white billionaire make a cringey rap parody. (She wasn’t actually a billionaire back then, but the point remains.)

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