The Alternative Number Ones: U2’s “Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me”

In The Alternative Number Ones, I’m reviewing every #1 single in the history of the Billboard Modern Rock Tracks/Alternative Songs, starting with the moment that the chart launched in 1988. This column is a companion piece to The Number Ones, and it’s for members only. Thank you to everyone who’s helping to keep Stereogum afloat.

Imagine having a song like this and throwing it away on the Batman Forever soundtrack. In 1995, U2 had a decade and a half in the game. In the grand scheme of the group's history, that puts them closer to the beginning than to their interminable, endless present, but it was long enough that they were an institution. U2 had already been through at least one successful reinvention, and they had avoided the plight that befell so many of their '80s alt-rock contemporaries. Even R.E.M., the closest American equivalent that U2 ever had, were just reaching the end of their dominant run in the mid-'90s. U2 were coming off of a hugely lucrative stadium tour and figuring out what to do next, and the thing that they decided to do next was to put a banger in the worst Batman film ever made. How does that happen?

The question answers itself, really. Batman Forever is just an unbelievable piece of shit, but it made a splash, at least financially. Director Joel Schumacher, taking over the franchise from Tim Burton, wanted to do business with U2, and U2 wanted to figure out what to do next after the golden run of Achtung Baby and Zooropa. The Batman Forever soundtrack gave them an opportunity. It gave them a big stage, a platform for a huge new single, but it didn't carry the pressure of the next reinvention. Without sacrificing their stadium momentum, U2 could play around a little. They could make something fun. What they came up with was "Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me," a towering meta-rocker driven by synth-whines, handclaps, and a full orchestra going ham like they were trying to outdo the arrangement on Led Zeppelin's "Kashmir." U2's next album didn't really follow the lead of "Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me." Instead, the song was a glorious little one-off, a side-quest that stands as a classic unto itself.